Sunshine
by Latham02
Summary: This vacation was going to be perfect. Mario, Princess Peach, and their Toad friends were all set to have the time of their lives at the luxurious Isle Delfino, but as soon as they arrive, Mario is arrested for a crime he didn't commit. Now it's up to the mysophobic robot F.L.U.D.D. to save the island and clear Mario's name. Humanized novelization, with F.L.U.D.D. as the star.
1. Prologue

It's an extraordinarily warm and sunny day over the ocean as a small passenger jet painted with pink stripes flew above the clouds, leaving a thin white contrail behind it as it flew. The insignia of the proud Toadstool dynasty, a Starman, was embossed on the top and bottom of the right wing and the tail fin of the plane, designating it as private plane of Princess Toadstool herself.

In the pink main cabin of the plane, its residents were all very comfortably enjoying the flight. Towards the front sat the beautiful and elegant Princess Peach, sporting her usual pink gown, blue medallion, sapphire earrings, and golden crown, but her long blonde hair was uncharacteristically wrapped into a ponytail. As much as she loved to have her locks flow free, she knew she couldn't let it get in the way where she was going.

Being a princess wasn't all it is cracked up to be. The responsibility of an entire kingdom on her shoulders, combined with the near constant kidnappings, made life incredibly stressful for Princess Peach. It still had its perks, however, and one of them was being able to go on vacation to wherever she wanted.

At that moment Peach's trusted adviser Toadsworth, a short old man with a large white mustache, purple vest, a light brown mushroom hat with dark brown spots, and small walking stick with a pallet swapped version of his cap topping it, came back from the bathroom and sat down on Peach's right. As Peach's right hand, it was his duty to remain by her side as much as possible.

Sitting on peach's left was Mario, who needs no introduction.

A computer screen at the front of the cabin showed the plane's progress toward their destination; the beautiful Isle Delfino; an island in the shape of dolphin. In a few seconds, a prerecorded message specially made for the Princess began to play.

What appeared to be a Starman suddenly appeared over the island, but the center was too round, and it had eight points instead of five. "Ooh, look at that" said Peach as a delightful charm began to play. A stylized tropical island and ocean then appeared onscreen, with the logo "Welcome to Isle Delfino" in bright bold letters in front of it.

"Welcome to the sun-drenched tropical paradise of Isle Delfino" said a man's disembodied voice before the logo cutaway to reveal a small crowd of people; the Piantas. They were of average height, but were made slightly taller by the small green or orange palm trees sticking out the tops of their heads. They all wore grass skirts dyed a variety of colors, from blue, to yellow, to brown, and everything in between, and each matching the color of their hair. They stood in front of a large statue of a Pianta in military garb, and with a large volcano looming over them all in the background.

"We're so pleased to welcome you to our beautiful home" continued the Pianta in front of the group.

"Come enjoy a natural wonderland to which we've added the world's finest resort facilities, a spectacular amusement park, and succulent seafood. All this and more await you on Isle Delfino. Come relax and let us refresh your body and spirit". All the while, photos of the island's attractions flashed across the screen.

"Mama mia!" Mario thought. "What I wouldn't give to sink my teeth into that crab". He was practically drooling onto his plane seat.

Toadsworth, meanwhile, was fantasizing about all the great rides he'd get to ride, and how he'd finally be able to relax away from work.

But Peach saw something in the video that no one else seemed to. It was in the background, and only for a few seconds, but she could have sworn that she saw…Mario.

That was impossible; she knew that. Mario was right there next to her, and she knew that Mario had never even heard of this island before a few days prior. She tried to ask Mario about what she saw, but he was too engrossed in the video to give a response. Toadsworth was equally caught up in his fantasies of the island to notice anything out of the ordinary, so Peach decided not to press the issue.

They were on vacation after all; they were doing this to help escape from needless worry. But even as the plane dropped through the clouds towards the airport, Princess peach had the feeling that their worries had only just begun.

* * *

Story inspired by and with cover art by 蓮男 on Pixiv.


	2. Chapter 1: Crash Landing

Princess Peach's plane began its decent towards the Isle Delfino airstrip, which was built over three small islands about a mile from the main island. The main island was far too uneven and full of historical landmarks to make room for an airport, so they built one out in the ocean to help accommodate tourists coming from far off lands, such as the Mushroom Kingdom.

As the three Toad pilots continued their decent, everything appeared to be fine. The control tower gave them permission to land, and the airstrip appeared to be clear, if a bit oddly colored.

What the Toads assumed to just be pink and orange paint they quickly discovered was much more than that. The circular mass of goo was actually creating a crater in the runway, and the center mass appeared to be moving…and alive. As soon as the plane touched down, the pilots activated the breaks in a desperate attempt to stop the plane from crashing into it. The plane ground to a halt, and launched its occupants forward. They had all failed to fasten their seatbelts, so Mario and his friends ended up dog piled on top of each other.

"What happened?" asked the Princess as her friends attempted to reorient themselves.

The plane had managed to stop just few feet away from the goo, which was blocking their path toward the control tower and the Piantas on the other side. They all got out of the plane to investigate.

Mario and Toadsworth quietly discussed what could be going on. Was this thing natural or manmade? Was this a coincidence or an attack on the Princess's life? Exactly how dangerous was this stuff? They each had a thousand questions, but no answers to their dilemma.

"What's this icky, paint-like goop?" asked one of the pilots. "It's moving!" yelled another.

"Now now, boys! Don't touch that stuff!" Toadsworth called back. Until they knew exactly what was going on, they were not taking any chances with the mysterious substance.

Princess Peach looked over to the other side of the runway to see if there was anyone was coming to help. What she saw shocked her; it was a little hard to make out, but standing on a water tower in the distance was Mario himself. There was something wrong about him though. Peach could only make out his outline, but he seemed somehow…dark.

"Excuse me, but…" Peach began to say to the Mario right next to her, but by the time she looked up the Shadow Mario was gone.

"I am most concerned with the well-being of the Princess in the dreadful heat" Toadsworth advised Mario. "Master Mario, if would, cross over to that shore and find some assistance".

Mario nodded his head, and was about to head off when Peach stopped him. "Mario, be careful! I have a bad feeling about this" said Princess Peach. She had a very concerned look on her face, and knew that Mario might be heading straight into a trap. "Don't worry Princess, I'mma sure I can handle it" Mario answered back with his trademark confidence.

Peach knew that nothing could stop Mario when he got his mind on something , so she just sighed an shook her head. "Just promise me you won't do anything stupid, alright?" the Princess said as she placed a hand on Mario's shoulder".

"Don't worry, nothing's beaten me yet!" said Mario, and with that, he began making his way to the other side of the runway.

Mario skillfully jumped his way through the gaps in the goop circle, not allowing any of it to stain his bright blue overalls. A Pianta that was attempting to reach the Princess's plane was not as fortunate. He ended up falling into the goo, which quickly devoured him, whole. Mario increased his pace, knowing that man needed help as soon as possible.

On the other side of the circle, the letter M appeared to be painted everywhere on this side of the runway, with both the mysterious goo and normal pain. A small dash was placed over each arch of the M's, making them appear almost like malevolent faces.

He went up to ask a nearby yellow-haired Pianta what was going on, but he just blew up in Mario's face. "What's going on? What do you mean, 'what's going on'? This is all your fault!"

"Calm down" Mario told the man. "I don't know what you're talking about! I just want to help!"

"Help?! If you really want to help, go take the new F.L.U.D.D. out of its case and activate it. That should help get things in order" yelled the Pianta.

Mario did as he was told and searched through some nearby crates for whatever a "F.L.U.D.D." was. Eventually he came across what appeared to be a person, but wasn't. It was short, like him, with neck length silver hair, yellow shorts with a big brown belt, brown leg warmers further down, a very small blue t-shirt with yellow sleeves and collar, and a yellow headband in its hair. It's skin was purely plastic, and metallic pumping machinery could be seen inside, and blue and yellow pumps appeared to be on its wrists.

"What in the world is this thing?" Mario asked aloud. He eventually found a button on the back of the robot's neck, and pressed it. The robot's metallic eyes than snapped open and began observing its surroundings.

"Power-up complete" it said in a very androgynous voice. "Thank you for purchasing me from Gadd Science, Incorporated. Preparing to register customer information". It's eyes then creepily fixed in on Mario and began to glow.

"Scanning and classifying subject data…subject identified as Mario, resident of the Mushroom Kingdom. Data Storage complete". With that, the robot appeared to relax a little, and stood up to greet Mario.

"I am F.L.U.D.D., a Flash Liquidizer Ultra Dousing Devise". It reached out its hand for Mario to shake, and he tried his best to return the handshake without panicking at the odd…thing before him. "How may I be of assistance?" it asked him.

"Uh…do you think you could help us with that?" Mario asked as he pointed towards the travesty occurring on the runway.

"Oh my, this is quite serious" said F.L.U.D.D. "Is there any source of water nearby? Fresh water, preferably".

"We're on an island! There's water everywhere" responded Mario, gesturing around him. "But there's a water tower over there if you don't like salt".

"It is not the salt that provokes me" responded F.L.U.D.D. "Do you have any idea what osteichthyes do in that water?"

F.L.U.D.D. then ran up to the pool beneath the nearby water-tower and stuck its right hand in. In a flash of light, its hand was replaced with a metal nozzle that be began to suck up the water inside. Mario could see the water fill F.L.U.D.D. from its feet to its head, and when it was full, it began washing away the M graffiti on that side of the airport with its hand-nozzle.

"What are you doing? There are people trapped in that goop over there!" Mario exclaimed at F.L.U.D.D.

"It would be more efficient to begin at one end of the airstrip and work towards the other" F.L.U.D.D. calmly explained.

"No, you've got to save those people now!" ordered Mario. The robot appeared to roll its mechanical eyes, but did as it was ordered. It was bound to follow the orders given by its owner, no matter what, and so moved onto free the civilian trapped in the goo.

"Whoo, thanks. I thought I was a goner there" said the now drenched Pianta as he backed away from the goo on the runway. "Hey, wait a minute…you!" he shouted, pointing a finger towards Mario. "You're the one who caused all this!"

"That is illogical, he was the one who ordered me to save you" F.L.U.D.D. explained. "You must have mistaken him for someone else".

"No, I'm sure it was him! I am getting the police!" And with that, the Pianta ran towards the control tower to try and get someone to arrest the fiend who just saved his life.

"Okay, now I'mma really confused" Mario said as he scratched the back of his head. Before he could ponder this any further though, the ground began to tremble. The central mass of the circle refused to be washed away by F.L.U.D.D.'s water jets, so F.L.U.D.D. was focusing all its water in an attempt to get rid of it.

The blob shook angrily in retaliation, catching everyone on the runway off-guard. The mass then bubbled as if it were boiling over, before it let out a large roar and sprang a large head from its center. It had no eyes, no ears, no nose; it was just one giant pink and orange mouth attached to thin stalk that connected it to the pile of goo below it. It took one look at F.L.U.D.D. and started drooling menacingly.

"Uh…I believe it would be pertinent for all users evacuate the area immediately" F.L.U.D.D. said with a slight quiver in its voice. They did not need to be told twice, as Peach and her entourage took cover behind their plane.

"I'mma not going anywhere, F.L.U.D.D." retorted Mario as he took up a fighting stance next to it.

"Nonsense, I am specifically designed to neutralize this kind of-" but before F.L.U.D.D. could finish its sentence, Mario had already leapt into action. He jumped on top of the monster's head, causing it to deflate slightly, but didn't actually seem to cause it any pain. Instead, it lunged straight towards F.L.U.D.D., trying to capture the little robot in its great gaping maw.

F.L.U.D.D. dodged out of the way and fired into its mouth, dissolving the monster partially from the inside. It screamed out in pain, but continued its pursuit nonetheless. Mario tried at least to get the monster's attention by jumping onto its base from behind, but that was hurting him much more than it was the monster. Seeing that water seemed to be the only thing that affected it at all, Mario ran off back towards the control tower in search of something that might hurt the thing.

F.L.U.D.D. in the meantime was holding its own against the monster, jumping and weaving away from its snapping mouth and waiting for the opportunity to finish it off. Eventually that time came, and F.L.U.D.D. blasted as much water as it could into the beast's mouth. The monster let out one last cry of agony before sinking into its center mass and disappearing.

If F.L.U.D.D. could breathe, it would have let out a strong sigh of relief. Not only had it completed its task, it also managed to do it without getting any of the disgusting paint on its brand-new body. If a robot was capable of hating something, F.L.U.D.D. knew it would hate oozy, gooey, slimy, gack like that.

F.L.U.D.D. was about to turn around to return to its owner when suddenly the monster's head reemerged and took hold of F.L.U.D.D. completely below the neck. F.L.U.D.D. was able to get one last glance at the sun before being plummeted into the depths of the whale.

Despite being so bright and colorful, it was deathly dark within the monster. F.L.U.D.D.'s optical sensors could not detect any light, although that was not what the automaton was focused on. The thing's juices were getting everywhere; in F.L.U.D.D.'s synthetic hair, on its clothes, in its mouth, in its gears. Soon F.L.U.D.D. just wished that the beast would just crush the robot in its stomach and end it all.

The next thing F.L.U.D.D. knew though, everything was bright again. There was still a lot of goo around, but most of it had been dissolved in water. Pieces of a smashed wooden water barrel also now lay strewn across the airstrip, alluding to what just saved F.L.U.D.D.'s programming.

"F.L.U.D.D., are you alright?" asked Mario. "I thought for a moment that you were done for".

F.L.U.D.D.'s circuits were practically overheating because of what just happened. Not that it was nearly eaten alive, but that human had actually risked its life to save a mere robot. "Il-Il-Illogical" was Mario could make out before F.L.U.D.D.'s system shut down and began to restart.

As the last of the monster melted away, the crater seemed to raise itself from the runway, as if it was never there in the first place. The star-like being Mario saw in the vacation promo than rose from the remnants of monster, and nearly blinded everyone there with its brightness. It floated for a few moments before flying off to the main island in the distance.

Soon F.L.U.D.D. had finished its reboot, and the Princess and her friends had reemerged from behind the airplane. "Wow, nice work Mario" said the princess.

"Mm, what an unusual person" Toadsworth remarked to F.L.U.D.D. "Who are you? Are you a boy or a girl?"

"I am F.L.U.D.D., and I am a robot. Glad to meet you" F.L.U.D.D. politely replied.

Introductions had to be cut short though, as Piantas in blue police uniforms began making their way down the runway. "Hey, someone's coming" pointed out one of the Toads, but before anyone could react, the two police had handcuffed Mario and began dragging him towards their police boat.

"Hey, what are you doing? You can't do this to me" Mario cried as he struggled.

"Tell it to the judge" one of the cops responded coldly before locking Mario in the back of boat and speeding off towards Isle Delfino.

"Mario!" F.L.U.D.D. called out towards its master, hand outstretched. It would have swam after Mario, but calculated that it could not swim nearly fast enough to catch up. At that moment, the thoughts of F.L.U.D.D. and Peach seemed to synchronize.

"Don't worry Mario, I'll save you".


	3. Chapter 2: Pianta-roo Court

The dark courtroom was alive with chatter and speculation as the trial was about to start. The only person who was completely silent was Mario, who was listening to legal advice from his lawyer, Toadsworth.

"Now master Mario, I'm sure that you're quite angry and confused right now, but it's vital that you keep your head! Anything you say can and will be used against you, so stay your tongue unless I specifically say so" explained Toadsworth. "Understand?"

Mario nodded silently as the Peach and her friends looked on from the audience. Mario still did not understand why he was there, but knew panicking was not going to make things any better.

"All rise for the honorable judge Violetta" said one of the police officers that arrested Mario.

The courtroom immediately quieted down, and stood up as the judge moved to take her seat. The silence was broken by the loud thwack of the judge's gavel, signaling what might be the beginning of the end for Mario.

"Court is now in session" said the Pianta judge.

Everyone immediately took their seats, except for the bespectacled prosecutor who approached the judge.

"As you are no doubt aware, your honor, someone has been senselessly defacing fair Isle Delfino using some paint-like substance. The accused is charged with polluting our beautiful home, and yes, endangering our very way of life" explained the prosecution.

Much of the courtroom went into an uproar when he said this, with the citizens of island threatening to overrun the courtroom in rage. The police managed to hold them back, and the judge desperately tried to restore order with her gavel.

"This can't be" Peach quietly whispered to herself. "Mario's one of the nicest people I know, Mario would never do anything so cruel".

"I concur, he has a longstanding history of generosity" said F.L.U.D.D., who was simultaneously searching through the internet for all the information on Mario it could find. "Files also indicate that custom officials confirm that he resided in the Mushroom Kingdom until just this morning".

Once the crowd was calm enough, the prosecutor continued his speech. "Indeed, how can one not be aware of what is going on? Even though it is daytime in Delfino Plaza, our poor residents tremble beneath a veil of darkness"

It was true; even though it was almost noon, the courtroom was receiving no outside light. It seemed like the entire area outside the main square was under heavy forecast even though there wasn't a cloud in the sky.

"Expert shine scholars have determined that this darkness has arisen because all of our guardians, the Shine Sprites, have vanished from their gathering spot at the Shine Gate. The reason? It's quite obvious. The horrible 'graffiti' is to blame".

F.L.U.D.D.'s eyes lit up (literally) at the word 'graffiti'. "What is it F.L.U.D.D.?" asked the Princess. "I do not know. There appear to be sections of my databanks marked with that word that I cannot access. This puzzles me" said F.L.U.D.D.

The prosecutor continued unabated, and presented what appeared to be a wanted poster to the court. "Behold this sketch of the perpetrator based on eyewitness descriptions. The truth is obvious; the guilty party sits among us. It is none other than Mario".

"Objection!" shouted Toadsworth, but the judge already knew how this trial was going to end.

"Overruled!" yelled the judge. "I find the defendant guilty as charged. You are hereby sentenced eighty years in prison for eco-terrorism, sabotage, and public vandalism".

"What? This isn't fair! This entire trial is a sham, and I won't stand for it!" Toadsworth shouted at the judge.

"Silence!" the judge shouted back. "You should be grateful his sentence is a lenient as it is, and I suggest that you accept my decision before I make it worse!"

"But Mario's been framed, I'm sure of it!" Peach shouted from the stands. "It was an imposter!"

"A likely story" the judge replied with her voice dipped in molten scorn. "Unless you happen to catch this 'imposter', then my sentence still stands. Court adjourned!"

With a final crack of the gavel, the police dragged Mario away to his comfy new home; a prison cell on eastern shore of Delfino Plaza with nothing but a small bed and a window that let in the sun's dull rays.

Both F.L.U.D.D. and Peach stood outside his cell, each hoping this wouldn't be their last meeting.

"Don't worry Mario" said Peach as optimistically as she could. "We'll find you a way out, no matter how long it takes".

"Correction Princess; we only have eighty years before his sentence expires, or Mario perishes while incarcerated" said F.L.U.D.D.

Mario did not say anything, and just looked down at his feet. After so many years of overcoming monsters, kings, armies, ghosts, and endless pitfalls, he couldn't believe he was going to die alone in a tiny room. His face was so sour that he could have ruined every piece of fruit on the island.

F.L.U.D.D. noticed this with its facial recognition software and tried to console Mario. "I promise Mario, I will locate the imposter and clear your name. Even if it means cleansing the entire island to do so". F.L.U.D.D. internal mechanisms seized at that thought; it did not want to see that graffiti ever again, but knew it had to if Mario was to go free.

Mario smiled and nodded, and his friends began walking away. He then lay down on his bed and tried his best to get comfortable; despite what his friends said, he had a feeling he was going to be there a while.


	4. Chapter 3: Delfino Plaza

F.L.U.D.D. walked out into the stale sunlight with Peach, each of them wondering what to do next. If Mario was to have any hope of getting out of that jail cell, they needed to find the imposter and fast.

"I say, perhaps we should not have gotten Mario's hopes up about freeing him" said Toadsworth as soon as he was sure he was out of earshot of Mario. "We don't even know where to look for this imposter".

"I don't think it will be that hard" responded the Princess. "I have a feeling this is much bigger than just framing Mario. He's bound to show up again".

As they walked through Delfino Plaza they quickly came across some of the imposter's handiwork. A thick brown sludge coated what used to be town square, and with what appeared to be another dormant graffiti monster at the center of it. F.L.U.D.D.'s nasal sensors helped inform it that whatever the substance was, it was most likely toxic. Citizens tried their best to avoid the massive rotting stain on their city, but it was simply impossible to ignore.

"I suppose getting rid of this goop is as good a place to start as any" said Peach, holding her nose with one hand and her parasol in the other. "F.L.U.D.D., can you get rid of this stuff?"

"I am designed to eliminate fires, sludge, oil spills, mudslides, and unsightly stains. Previous data also shows that 'grafiti' is easily eliminated by water, meaning that I am perfectly capable to 'get rid of this stuff'" F.L.U.D.D. responded in a monotone voice.

"So you'll do it then?" asked the Princess.

"Gadd, no! The chances of me getting covered in that disgusting substance increase exponentially the closer I am. We must also remember the fact that my previous encounter with this kind of monster almost ended in my destruction" F.L.U.D.D. said nervously.

"But if you don't do something, the island will remain encased in darkness!" Toadsworth pleaded.

F.L.U.D.D. shook its head, however. "That may be a positive thing; the shade keeps the island's temperature at a more comfortable level, it lessens the chances of skin cancer and burns, it lowers camera glare and makes the world easier to see…"

"But what about Mario?" asked the Princess.

F.L.U.D.D. stood there for a moment and processed what Peach said. "If there is a chance that this could assist Mario out of his sentence, then I have no choice but to assist my owner. Even if it means…becoming a little filthy" said F.L.U.D.D.

"That's the spirit!" Toadsworth said in his most 'you can do it' voice.

"That's right, and we'll be here cheering you on the whole way" Princess Peach agreed.

F.L.U.D.D. once again sincerely wished it had the capacity to sigh, but instead only a plastic flavored puff gas escaped its mouth as its gears turned. F.L.U.D.D. went over to a nearby fountain and refilled itself with water. It wondered why no one was already trying to wash the graffiti away when there was so much water readily available.

F.L.U.D.D.'s hand shifted into its hose form and began to suck up as much water as it could. Once F.L.U.D.D. began washing the brown goop away, but it did not react the same way the pink and orange graffiti did. Instead of just dissolving away, it appeared to boil and get even get mad. The bubbles formed what appeared to be semi-transparent, multicolored jellyfish. Their googly eyes stared blankly at F.L.U.D.D.

F.L.U.D.D. didn't know how to react to these fruity blobs. They did not seem that threatening at first, but then they began to launch themselves one by one at the robot.

The blobs collided with F.L.U.D.D. with a loud splotch, like a rotten orange hitting a wall, before exploding and sending the muddy graffiti flying everywhere, and knocking F.L.U.D.D. off its feet. Now it knew why the citizens were so reluctant to try and attack the graffiti.

"Ewwww! Ew ew ew ew ewww!" F.L.U.D.D. said as it tried to spray off the goo as quickly as possible. The graffiti came off quickly, but the scent and sense of violation lingered.

"F.L.U.D.D., watch out!" Peach cried from a safe distance away behind F.L.U.D.D.

While it was distracted, more of the goo-balls had formed and set their sights on F.L.U.D.D. In a panic, F.L.U.D.D. spun around with its hose firing in all directions in the hope hitting some of the blobs. It worked, and when F.L.U.D.D. finally slowed down there wasn't a single one left.

"Pfft, F.L.U.D.D.! Watch where you're shooting that thing" coughed Toadsworth.

F.L.U.D.D. turned its head just enough to see that it had completely drenched all its new friends in the crossfire. "Augh, and this is a dry clean only dress too" moaned the Princess.

Before F.L.U.D.D. could issue a formal apology, the ground began to shake. With a loud roar, the paint monster revealed its brown maw from its center mass and began searching for its next meal.

The monster spotted F.L.U.D.D. and thrust its head forward. F.L.U.D.D. dodged out of the way by sliding forward under its head and away from its snapping jaws. Peach and her friends were not as lucky, because the monster's momentum caused its excess graffiti to splatter the Princess and the Toads.

"No! Now it's completely ruined!" Peach screamed.

Again, F.L.U.D.D. wished to apologize, but knew there were more important matters at hand. F.L.U.D.D. got back on its feet began strafing the monster, keeping its head just out of reach as it snapped its toothless gourd at the androgynous android. F.L.U.D.D. fired shot after shot of water into the beast's mouth until it couldn't take it anymore and it drew back in pain.

For whole minute, neither one was willing to make the next move. It would have been the stare down of the century if either of its participants had real eyes. Finally, F.L.U.D.D. charged with its hose firing and the paint beast's head swept down to meet it. The creature was smart enough to keep its mouth shut this time though, and managed to get a hold of F.L.U.D.D. below the neck.

"Oh no!" cried Toadsworth. "Not again!"

Computers don't make the same mistake twice though; this was all part of F.L.U.D.D.'s plan. Inside the monster's maw, F.L.U.D.D.'s back compartment opened up to reveal two jet nozzles and F.L.U.D.D. began to fire as hard as it could.

The beast was in incredible pain, but it was not about to let its prey go. F.L.U.D.D. just kept firing, hoping the beast would give in before F.L.U.D.D.'s system became too clogged with graffiti. The monster's head appeared to swell for a moment before suddenly bursting like a cherry, and sending water everywhere.

F.L.U.D.D. hit the ground with a loud crack, and Princess Peach rushed over to make sure it was alright.

"I detect no structural damage princess, though I thank you for your concern" F.L.U.D.D. responded as it tried to cleanse itself of the goo it was just coated in. The ground once again began to shake though, and F.L.U.D.D. re-engaged its hand nozzle. It wasn't another monster though; it was Pianta military statue Peach saw in the island promo rising up through the remnants of the monster. She was about to relax when she noticed there was still something wrong with the statue.

"…Mario?" said the Princess.

Standing there on top of the statue was the same figure she saw at the airstrip and in the vacation video, each time slipping away before Peach could get a good look at him. He unmistakably looked like Mario, right down to the same magnificent moustache, and trademark outfit. He did not appear real though, almost as if he was made out of water or some kind of dark paint. The only thing red about him was the color of his eyes, which burned with the intensity of field of hot chili peppers.

Shadow Mario wasn't running away from Peach this time though, and instead leapt down from the statue towards peach. Without a word, Shadow Mario pricked her up over his shoulder and began running north.

"F.L.U.D.D.! Help!" cried the Princess as her dirty form was carried off into the distance.

"Hold on Princess, I'm on my way!" F.L.U.D.D. said with its volume raised.

F.L.U.D.D. chased the two through the city streets, dodging and weaving through citizens, and trying not to lose sight of them. Shadow Mario tried his best to try and lose F.L.U.D.D., but no matter what he did, F.L.U.D.D. was able to do it as well. Jumping over obstacles, back flipping onto the tops of buildings, sliding around corners, F.L.U.D.D. could do it all. The robot still wasn't any closer to catching the bad fruit though, and had to think of something fast.

As they rounded the corner onto the plaza fruit market, F.L.U.D.D. tried to find something that might stop the fiend. Thinking fast, F.L.U.D.D.'s processors began sorting through its options at the speed of light. "Pineapples? Not aerodynamic enough. Watermelons? Too small a mass. Wait! That one is perfect".

With inhuman precision, F.L.U.D.D. ran up to a nearby durian stand and kicked one of the fruits towards Shadow Mario's head. Shadow Mario hit the ground with a large thud and huge, rancid smelling bump on the back of his head. Princess Peach was finally able to get up and start dusting herself off, and F.L.U.D.D. could move in to secure the perp.

"That is for making smell like sewage!" said F.L.U.D.D. as it pointed its nozzle towards the Shadow Mario. "Oh, and for framing Mario as well".

"Ow! Ow! That was completely unfair! You shouldn't even BE here, you little toaster!" said Shadow Mario. His voice was surprisingly high pitched, almost like a child trying sound like an adult and failing miserably.

"There has been no mistake" corrected F.L.U.D.D. "I was ordered and shipped to Isle Delfino on July 1st-"

Before it could finish clarifying, Shadow Mario swept his brush towards F.L.U.D.D.'s feet and tripped it. The mysterious man then got up and started running back towards the statue. It only a moment for F.L.U.D.D.'s sensors to realign, and then it was back up and chasing after Shadow Mario.

Shadow Mario managed to reach the statue first and drew a large, colorful M on it. F.L.U.D.D. was right behind him and thought it had the man cornered, but Shadow Mario dived into the M and seemed to disappear. The robot was not about to let its prey go, and dived into the M after him.

* * *

Meanwhile with Toadsworth, he had finally managed to reach Princess Peach, though he was still panting quite heavily. He was in better shape than the Princess however; in all the commotion of the fight and the chase, Peach's clothes had become drenched and nearly see through, stained brown in several places, her high heels were missing, the left half of her skirt was torn off, and her blouse was stretched the point of barley staying on her shoulders.

"Princess, are you quite alright?" asked Toadsworth.

"I've been soaked, covered in putrid goo, dragged through the streets, and nearly kidnapped AGAIN! How do you think I feel Toadsworth?" Peach said with sour venom in her voice.

"Not very well I'd-"

"That was rhetorical, Toadsworth" Peach said as she wrung out her ponytail. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be in my hotel room if you need me".

"Miss Toadstool, I don't think it is very befitting of a princess to walk in the streets covered and filth…and practically half naked!" Toadsworth called after her.

"Don't care, going back to hotel" Peach yelled back.


	5. Chapter 4: Road to the Big Windmill

In retrospect, diving headfirst into a mysterious portal without any idea what was on the other side was a bit shortsighted on the part of F.L.U.D.D. There could be a trap on the other side, or another monster, or more of that disgusting goo.

It was hard for F.L.U.D.D.'s optical sensors to detect much while going through the portal. Everything was a blur of colors and bright light; all the while F.L.U.D.D.'s GPS system went haywire. It was very similar to what F.L.U.D.D.'s databanks indicated travel by pipe was like, but much less stable and directed. The possibility of having its atoms scattered across the island crossed F.L.U.D.D.'s processor, but it was not long before those worries to put to rest in the form of the portal spitting the robot out onto cold rock.

The impact was much more violent than F.L.U.D.D. had anticipated, and caused one of its cameras to pop out of its sockets. It did not land far though, so F.L.U.D.D. calmly walked over to it, picked the camera back up, wiped off the lens, and stuck it back inside the robot's head.

F.L.U.D.D. blinked a few times to make sure it was clean, and adjusted its focus to observe its surroundings. F.L.U.D.D. appeared to be on cobblestone path lined with palmed trees. In the distance, it could see small village, white buildings sticking up like cauliflower in the green countryside. The town appeared to be divided in half by a large white wall running through the center of it.

On the left half were many small houses, several with small windmills twirling away on top of them. The whole scene was very picturesque, and a shining example of peace and tranquility in the countryside. On the right side of the wall, things were nearly the opposite.

Almost everything was covered in the mud-like graffiti. A few trees and small windmills rose above it, but F.L.U.D.D. could see many more slowly begin to sink into the revolting mess. Piantas ran screaming from the scene as yet another dormant goo monster fired giant graffiti boulders in every direction.

F.L.U.D.D. noticed a small speck standing next to the goop generator and zoomed in on it. Standing right next to the beast was the Shadow Mario, who, judging by his lip movements, was giving the monster orders.

F.L.U.D.D. was still trying to decipher what he was saying, but was interrupted by a nearby voice. "Are you alright?" it called.

The robot turned and saw a Pianta man with blue hair standing behind one of the palm trees with a terrified look on his face. "Your eye kind of…popped out for a moment there".

"All F.L.U.D.D. units are designed to have easily interchangeable parts, so I have suffered no structural damage. Thank you for your concern though" said F.L.U.D.D. with a wide smile towards the end. Data suggested that smiling helps to reassure and comfort people who are distressed like this man.

This had the opposite effect on the Pianta man though, who became even more afraid of the plastic…thing in the middle of the road. "Really? I would have cracked my skull from a fall like that, are you sure you don't need any help miss…?"

"My name is F.L.U.D.D., but I am not a girl" said the android. "Can you please tell me where we are? What is happening?"

The Pianta man considered calling a UFO hotline to report this alien that just fell from the sky, but decided that town had bigger problems at the moment. "Uh…you're in the Bianco Hills, and I'm not sure what's going on. That man from the wanted posters just showed up out of nowhere and covered the whole eastern part of the town in goo. Now no one can get to the Big Windmill, and that thing grinds grain for the whole island. I thought we were safe from all that gack out here, but I guess not".

F.L.U.D.D. looked back towards the graffiti generator and zoomed in, but Shadow Mario was already gone. It searched everywhere, but couldn't find the little blueberry anywhere. It did manage to notice the river that wrapped around the village, which meant that at least water wouldn't be a problem in the fight, and the town's main windmill in the distance.

There appeared to be something on top of the windmill as well, but the android's resolution wasn't high enough to tell what it was. It looked almost like a giant person, but F.L.U.D.D. knew that couldn't be right.

"I suppose I have no choice but to clean up this mess too" F.L.U.D.D. said to thin air before suddenly turning its attention back towards the Pianta man. "Thank you for your informational assistance, sir. Is there any way I can repay you?"

"N-no, that's fine" replied the Pianta man, putting up his hands defensively. He didn't want to interact with this thing anymore than he had to. "If you're going to clean up the town like you say, that'd be payment enough".

"That appears to be a fair deal" said F.L.U.D.D., but did not make to leave. It just stood there looking at him.

Finally it spoke again, saying "My databanks don't contain any data pertaining to traditional Pianta farewells, and I do not wish to offend you".

"Oh!" he said, quite surprised "Well, we usually say hello or goodbye with a kiss-"

Not wanting to waste any more time, F.L.U.D.D. efficiently closed this distance between and planted a kiss on the stunned Pianta's lips. It wasn't a very flavorful or spicy kiss, but it had happened nonetheless.

"-on the cheek" finished the Pianta. "And even then, we only do it with family".

Realizing its mistake, F.L.U.D.D.'s internal processors began calculating five thousand times per millisecond in search of a solution to the awkward situation. "Oh, uh….bye!" said the robot before dashing down the road with circuits practically ablaze with embarrassment.

Once it reached the river at the end of the road, F.L.U.D.D. got a better look at the village. There didn't seem to be a house in the entire town that didn't have a windmill on top of it, or at least had a small windmill nearby. Judging by the intricate network of wires and cables connecting everything, the town used wind to power almost everything.

Strangely, there didn't seem to be a bridge connecting the path to the town. Instead there was just a tightrope suspended above the river, as if that was all that was needed to reach the other side.

"What an odd custom" F.L.U.D.D. again said to no one. It climbed up onto one end and began making its way across to the other side. Things went fine until it was halfway across, when the wind suddenly seemed to punch F.L.U.D.D. off the cable and into the river.

F.L.U.D.D. was fine, of course, but annoyed. It seemed the wind here could turn into a serious problem. Still, the robot couldn't let a little wind slow it down, and simply activated its hover nozzle on its back to get up onto the opposite bank.

It didn't take the robot long to find a group of Piantas all gathered before a large wooden gate in the wall dividing the town. They were all passing each other planks of wood and nails, and trying desperately to seal their side of the town from the other.

One Pianta with red hair in particular was attempting to nail another board to the gate furiously, but was so nervous he kept missing the head. "Please sir, allow me to help you with that" F.L.U.D.D. said as it took the hammer from the man and rammed in the nail. Suddenly, it took a more hostile stance and said "Now then, I demand that you stop erecting this barricade".

"No way! Have you seen those creatures out there?" he asked.

"I am aware that they are quite unseemly and dirty, but I have no choice. I was ordered to by a fat, Italian plumber" explained F.L.U.D.D. "Is there any other way there?"

He thought for a moment, and said "I guess you could try the gear wheel down the road, if you're that suicidal".

The robot was unfazed by the insult, however, and instead ran off down the road with a just a simple "Thank you".

It wasn't entirely clear what this giant wooden gear in the wall was, or why it was there, but it was the only way F.L.U.D.D. was going to reach the other side. The robot carefully timed how long the gap under the gear remained open before another spoke came back down, and quickly dived under it when the opportunity presented itself.

Finally where all the action was, F.L.U.D.D. approached the graffiti with nozzle ready. It began to wash the filth away, there weren't as many blob creatures rising up to stop the robot. Instead, the ground shifted a little, and a piranha plant sprouted from the gack, covered in it.

"Oh dear" said F.L.U.D.D., unsure of exactly what to do. Plants thrived on fresh water, so it didn't know how it was going to fight them.

F.L.U.D.D. didn't have much time to think though, as the piranha plants started quickly snapping away at the android's limbs, trying to snap one off and carry it back under ground. At first F.L.U.D.D. tried to punch them, but the hydraulics in its arms weren't nearly strong enough to do any actual damage.

"What would Mario do?" thought the robot as the plants started to close in from all directions. In desperation, it tried jumping on one of the weeds, but was rewarded with a foot caught in the plant's mouth and being subsequently tossed around like a ragdoll. With no other options, F.L.U.D.D. fired its water cannon at the plant.

At first the plant was reacting how F.L.U.D.D. expected by becoming bigger and stronger, but then it started to bloat. It eventually swelled up with so much water it exploded, sending water everywhere and cleaning up more of the goo.

This relaxed F.L.U.D.D. immensely, because that meant this fight was going to be even easier than it thought…not that robots could feel fear, however. That would just be silly.

One by one, the piranha plants exploded like overstuffed watermelons, and more and more of the graffiti was cleaned up. The goo generator noticed this, and started hurling its polluted boulders directly towards F.L.U.D.D.

The little robot had to think quickly, and dived out of the way. The boulder rolled past, leaving a trail of brown slime behind it like an obese slug before falling into the river and dissolving.

"Hey!" F.L.U.D.D. shouted angrily at the monster. "I just cleaned that!"

F.L.U.D.D. then focused all its attention on the monster; firing all the water it could at the monster to force it out into the open. Eventually the generator couldn't take it anymore, and raised its ugly head from the muck to try and fight back.

F.L.U.D.D. was more than prepared for this fight, however, because it had already fought the beast twice before. Just avoid its bite, and fire into its mouth when it let its guard down. It was honestly getting quite monotonous for the android, and hoped for variety's sake it wouldn't have to fight another one in future.

The first shot of water caught the monstrosity off guard, but it was prepared for the second one. It tried several times to bite F.L.U.D.D., but it was slow, and the robot could now calculate all its moves in advance. Eventually the beast became frustrated, and reared its head back for a final strike.

The agile automaton just jumped out of the way though, causing the creature's head to crash straight into the river it was next to. It let out one last scream before it began to dissolve away like a rancid grape. The path the generator was on then rose up towards the bridge leading to the big windmill in the distance. At the top, a Shine Sprite materialized from what was left of the creature.

F.L.U.D.D. was forced to shield its cameras with its hands, the thing was so bright. The robot reached out to touch it, but the instant it did the Sprite sped off into the distance, and back towards the Shine Gate. Although only F.L.U.D.D.'s sensors could detect the difference, the whole island suddenly became slightly brighter.

The little robot was not sure how to feel about that day. On the one hand, another part of the island was cleaned and a Shine Sprite was freed from its prison, but on the other, Shadow Mario had escaped without a trace and Mario was still in jail.

"Oh well" said F.L.U.D.D. "It unlikely the perpetrator is very far". It was about to step forward and continue onto the big windmill, when suddenly an icon started flashing red in the corner of F.L.U.D.D.'s vision.

"Power at critical levels" said a voice inside from a speaker hidden under F.L.U.D.D.'s hair. "Please recharge as soon as possible". Unfortunately for the robot, its adventures were on hold its power levels were full again, and it would take all night to do that. F.L.U.D.D.'s trip to the Bianco Hills was going to be much longer than it had hoped.

* * *

Back in Delfino Plaza, jail life was even less exciting than Mario thought it would be. The jail had no library, no courtyard, no exercise equipment, and no other inmates! He was the only person imprisoned on the entire island, so all he had to do was look out the window and pray for something interesting to happen. He was almost glad when Peach was almost kidnapped earlier that day, because that at least that made for a good show.

Suddenly, one of the guards came up to his cell and knocked on the bars. "Hey, strawberry-head! You've got a visitor".

He was mostly expecting it to be the Princess or one of the Toads there to explain what happened earlier, but it was someone else entirely.

The fang sticking out the bottom of her smile identified her as a Goomba. Her long blonde hair was braided back into a ponytail and she was wearing a yellow bikini top with a blue towel tied around her waist. She was carrying a large stack of books in her arms, which she placed down next to Mario's cell with a loud thud.

"Long time, no see Mario".


	6. Chapter 5: Down with Petey Piranha

"Goombella! What are you doing here?" Mario asked through the bars.

"Vacation, duh!" she replied, taking a seat on her books. "Me and my friends from college are here for the summer, but it's been a real bummer. Most of the attractions have been shut down, I haven't been able to get any kind of tan, and then I hear that you're in jail! So much for paradise, huh?"

"You said it" responded Mario.

"Anyways, I heard about your court case, and it sounds super shady. Like, they convict you without even asking for a word from the defense, or even if you plead guilty or innocent? Sounds mega fishy if you ask me" said Goombella intently.

"So? The trial's over, and I'mma stuck here" Mario replied despondently.

"Not quite!" Goombella stood up and picked up a particularly large book from her pile labeled 'Global Justice', and showed it to Mario. "Luckily for you, I'm double majoring in archeology and law at the University of Goom. I think I can get you a retrial, and maybe even reverse your sentence!"

"Really? You'd do that for me?" Mario asked, stunned.

"Totally! Besides, I'm sooo completely bored out of my eyeballs without anything to do" she said, stretching down her face for emphasis. "And it should be super easy to get you out with the real criminal still on the loose. It would be impossible for you to lose a retrial, fer shur!"

"Thanks Goombella, you're a life saver" replied Mario. For the first time since he arrived on this dreadful island.

"Ah, forget about it; this isn't the first time I've saved your Baldwin butt, after all" said Goombella, and with that, she picked up all her books and headed towards the jail exit. A guard held the door open, but Goombella turned her head back on last time.

"Don't worry Mario, I'll have you out of that drab cell in no time~". She emphasized her statement with a quick wink, and stepped back outside to Delfino Plaza. "Oh, hey Peach! You here to see Mario too?"

Peach stood there in front of the prison in her new dress, and a slightly stunned look on her face. "Uh, yeah. It's nice to see you again Goombella".

"Ditto, but I've gotta run. It was great seeing you again though!" Goombella said as she waved and walked away.

"Uh huh" Peach said just before she shutting the prison door behind her. "Mario!"

* * *

F.L.U.D.D.'s cameras lit suddenly lit up, signaling that its batteries were fully charged. The Pianta man it had accidentally assaulted the previous day was kind enough to allow the robot to recharge in his home, but it was more because he was afraid of what might happen if he left the robot alone for too long.

"I must again thank you for allowing me access to your electrical systems" F.L.U.D.D. said as the tired Pianta brewed his morning cup of coffee in a blueberry blue bath robe.

"Don't mention it" he replied, wiping the sleep from his eyes. "In fact, never come back here again".

He held his front door open, and began pushing the robot out. "Just go home, alright?"

F.L.U.D.D. couldn't carry out that order for a variety of reasons; it couldn't leave until Shadow Mario was apprehended, there were still large sections of Bianco Hills that still needed cleaning before the mysterious man could be found, etc. There was one reason in particular that stood out to F.L.U.D.D. however.

"But I don't have a –" but before it could finish, the man slammed the door in the robot's plastic face.

"-home".

F.L.U.D.D. just stood there a few moments, unsure of what to do next. Eventually, it snapped itself out if it and remembered why it was there. There was a strange figure on top of the Big Windmill, and it was the android's job to find out what it was, and whether or not it was connected to the mysterious Shadow Mario.

It made its way through the village, out the newly reopened gate into the east side of town. There, townspeople calmly used ladders to pluck fruit from the many trees that lined the path to the windmill, each occasionally glancing at the robot as it ran past. They were all very grateful for what it did the previous day, but they were still slightly weary. What was that thing? Where did it come from? Could they trust it?

The automaton didn't give them an opportunity to ask though, as it continued with its processor dead set on reaching the top of the windmill. Upon reaching the bridge connecting the mainland to the windmill's island, F.L.U.D.D. began to properly assess the situation.

Most of the island was still covered in the mud-like graffiti from yesterday, and the rest appeared to be wrapped with red vines with large spikes and green spots. They were like rotten rose stems, and ran from the top of the windmill to the small lake down below. F.L.U.D.D. could now see clearly to the top of the windmill, and it did, in fact, seem to be a person.

His skin was slightly tanned, and his muscles were finely toned, like cobblestone road. F.L.U.D.D. could see this because he wasn't wearing a shirt, just a pair of green overalls that were red with white polka dots near the waist. His arms also very strong, but slowly gave way to leaves at the end instead of hands and forearms.

F.L.U.D.D. still couldn't get a good look at his face however ; it was hidden under a large red hood with white polka dots, and adorned with orange flower petals around the bottom and across the back of its head. His smile was clearly visible, however, and had visibly sharp teeth hiding behind his bright green lips. If F.L.U.D.D. didn't know any better, it'd swear he was smirking at the robot.

As if on cue, the piranha man began waving his leafy arms around, and conjured a giant ball of brown graffiti from nowhere.

"Uh oh" F.L.U.D.D. said right before the man tossed the goo towards the robot.

F.L.U.D.D. began dashing down the road to the windmill, running as erratically as it could to avoid getting hit. One by one the balls exploded on the path, sending even more of the goo everywhere and partially coating F.L.U.D.D.'s back.

"Ew! So gross! But I can't stop" thought the robot as it continued running towards the windmill. 'Must keep going'. F.L.U.D.D. could barely stand to look at the stuff, and so shut off its cameras to avoid looking at the awful, disgusting sight.

It quickly learned how grave a miscalculation this was, though, when the robot subsequently slipped on some graffiti further up, and once again land straight on its face. It just laid there for a few moments, like a yellow car stuck on a dirt road, and waited for the last strike to finish it off.

When the attack never came, F.L.U.D.D. reactivated its cameras and looked around. It had managed to make it behind the windmill, and thought for a moment that it had managed to reach the man's blind spot. It was quite sorely mistaken though.

Instead of throwing the balls at the robot, it was now rolling them down the path like bowling balls in an attempt to crush F.L.U.D.D. The android didn't even have time to wipe itself off before they started rolling down the hill towards it, and F.L.U.D.D. had to start dodging them. Whoever this man was, he seemed to be playing with F.L.U.D.D. instead of just going in for the kill.

The higher F.L.U.D.D. got on the hill, the less frequent the attacks became, and the denser the red vines became. Upon closer inspection, it was clear the vines were actually roots, and was visibly pumping water like veins up from the lake/river below, to the top of the windmill. This man didn't just look like a plant, he was one.

F.L.U.D.D. deduced that he stopped hurling balls because, if he hit the roots, he'd be hitting himself. Eventually the vines became so thick F.L.U.D.D. had to start using its hover nozzles on its back to get around them. It wasn't sure if the roots were dangerous, but the robot wasn't going to take the chance on their sharp barbs.

The robot then finally reached the end of the path, but, unfortunately, not the top of the windmill. It tried pulling open the front door, but found it locked from the inside, and the android's hose proved to be an ineffective at breaking it down.

The piranha man on top of the windmill noticed this and started laughing at the tiny fire hydrant. It didn't ever stand a chance of reaching him. F.L.U.D.D. quietly steamed below him; it wasn't about to let vegetable beat it so easily.

The robot looked around for some way, any way, to reach the top of the windmill, but found none. Eventually, though, it noticed that the blades of the windmill were still turning. F.L.U.D.D. leapt onto the nearest one as it passed by and started hanging on for dear programming as it lifted the automaton skywards. The wind was very strong, and F.L.U.D.D. wasn't entirely sure it would make it to the top, but held on anyways.

Once at the crest of the blade's arch, F.L.U.D.D. launched itself backwards and turned itself around using its hover nozzles. Carefully, it landed on the roof of the windmill in front of the piranha man and readied its water cannon.

"Now what?" thought F.L.U.D.D., who did not calculate this far ahead in its strategy.

The man did not give it any time to think either, and quickly used some of its own roots to snatch up the little robot by the waist. F.L.U.D.D. tried to struggle, but it was no use. "Well, well, well, if it isn't the little engine that could. Congratulations on reaching the top of the 'Big Windmill'. You must be sooo proud of yourself" the large man said to the robot, lazily.

"Who are you? What are you doing here?" asked F.L.U.D.D., no longer trying to break free.

"Petey Piranha, at your service" he replied, taking a small bow. "And I'm the one is who's here to stop you from sticking your little plastic nose where it doesn't belong".

Without warning, Petey slammed F.L.U.D.D. down onto the roof of the windmill, leaving a huge in the mill's wood tiled surface. "You see I've got a pretty sweet deal here. I take care of you, and I get this whole part of the island to myself. With all this fresh water, and I can just sit here all day…and grow…and grow…and grooow" moaned Petey Piranha, brown graffiti dripping from his crocodile smile. The thick roots writhed and pulsated even harder around F.L.U.D.D. as he said this.

"So the only real question left is what to do with you" said Petey, standing up straight and refocusing his attention on F.L.U.D.D. "You're very annoying, so maybe I'll make you my personal alarm clock. You're shiny, so you'd also make great fish bait". The robot was beginning to regret wishing away the goo generators that it used to fight.

F.L.U.D.D. tried once again to get away, but root was way too strong. Petey Piranha brought the restrained robot up to his face and continued; "Or since you love squirming so much, maybe I'll just keep you as my own personal-"

The robot finally saw its chance and took it, striking the man right where it suspected his eye was. Petey screamed out a deafening roar, and dropped F.L.U.D.D. down onto the ground.

"You're going to pay for that" said the giant man, tensing up his body and preparing to attack from all angles. Once again, F.L.U.D.D. found itself in a deadly standoff, with neither side willing to make the first move.

Before either of them could do anything, though, a loud snap split the air like a knife. They both looked around for the source of the noise, but neither of them found anything. Then it happened again, clearly resounding from the hazardously cracked roof below them. The two had just enough time to look at each other, mouths agape, before it collapsed altogether.

"Aaaaaaaahhh!" they yelled as they fell through the windmill, each of them smashing onto various gears and other pieces of machinery on the way down. Petey's roots got caught in many of them on the way down and tore off, meaning he'd be on his own in the windmill.

F.L.U.D.D.'s final impact was lessened by its light weight and hover nozzles, but Petey Piranha hit the concrete floor with an incredible thud, and was quite visibly dazed and confused. He started swinging away with his leafy arms and shoeless legs, but the little robot moved too quickly for the lumbering goliath.

Desperate and aware of how hurt he was, Petey took a deep breath fired out as much of the graffiti as he could in the hopes of hitting F.L.U.D.D. It worked, and soon the jellyfish like blobs began to rise out of it and started attacking the robot as well.

No matter how many times it got positively drenched in that disgusting goo, F.L.U.D.D. simply could not get used to it. It always felt so wrong and revolting, and made all its systems run slower when it got in its circuits. But just like before, it would wash off. Just like before, F.L.U.D.D. would repair itself in preparation for the next dowsing of sludge.

"Just like before…"

Just like that thought, F.L.U.D.D. knew what it had to do. It spun around once with its hose firing before stopping and taking aim at Petey's mouth.

"Ack! Pft! What are you doing?" Petey asked as he tried and failed to cover his mouth with his leafy hands. Eventually the water weight became too much and he fell onto his back, stomach bulging outwards. The robot did not stop firing though, and kept up the assault on its mouth.

"You're no different than those other putrid piranhas" F.L.U.D.D. said triumphantly. "Too much water, and…"

The man finally exploded with a loud boom, spraying liquid everywhere like an overfilled water balloon. F.L.U.D.D. was quite relieved that the man's insides were nothing more than mud-graffiti, meaning he was really nothing more than an oversized jellyfish monster.

And, just like the goop generators, a shine sprite rose from the remains of the monster and flew up out of the windmill, and back towards Delfino plaza. For a moment F.L.U.D.D. actually felt a bit…happy. That didn't last long though, as it quickly remembered that Shadow Mario was still nowhere to be found.

It quickly walked over to windmill entrance and headed off in pursuit once again.


	7. Chapter 6: Hillside Cave Secret

After reassuring Mario at the jail, Goombella set back out through Delfino Plaza with her books in in tow. She'd have to study every detail she could if she was ever going to get her friend out of that prison, but as much as she liked learning, she couldn't help but feel a bit disappointed her dream vacation was taken away from her like this.

She and her friends even managed to get hotel rooms right in the town center too, so they could see the Shine Sprites and ride the gondolas. Sadly, all boats on the island, even the gondolas, were to be kept in port until the oily mess of Ricco Harbor was finally cleaned up, and the Shine Gate was lifeless and covered in black tar.

Or at least it should have been; as Goombella walked down Main Street, she could make out a few Shine Sprites circling around the giant Shine Sprite statue at the top of the gate. It was hard to make out because they were so small, and the Shine Sprite statue was so high up on the gate, but she could definitely see a few Sprites flying around it.

"Huh; maybe my luck's turning around a bit" she thought as she walked by the city's lifeless canals. "Yeah, as if. I still have all this work to do".

She walked into the hotel lobby and quickly walked up a flight of stairs and into her room. There, her college/hotel roommate was there in the bathroom, putting on some suntan oil in her purple swimsuit. Her hair was blonde, like Goombella's, but much shorter. She was also much skinnier than Goombella, almost the point someone would mistake her for a boy.

"Goombella!" the roomie yelled excitedly, dropping the oil and running up to hug the returning bookworm.

Goombella leapt out of the way though, careful not to touch the slippery banana. "Nuh uh! Not on the books Goomsa" Goombella scolded. She then walked over to one of the old, wooden desks on the opposite side of the room, placed a book on it, and cracked it open.

"You're never any fun, Bell" Goomsa whined overdramatically. "I brought you here to get your nose out of those annoying books! Don't you want to catch some awesome waves, or play some games on the beach, or anything?"

"Totally! But my friend needs help to get out of the slammer, and I'm not just going to abandon him" Goombella said, trying to focus on the book in front of her.

"You'll turn into a Gloomba if don't get some sunshine, girl" Goomsa said as she gathered up her beach towel and volley ball.

"Puh-lease, you'd have a better chance getting a tan from a microwave than out there" responded Goombella. "Besides, I still have my report on ancient civilizations to do too, and don't get me started on that grody geometry project".

"Fine, have it your way betch" Goomsa said as she made her way to the door. "Have fun working, I'll be out there living!"

* * *

F.L.U.D.D. stepped out from the windmill and back into the white cliffs of Bianco Hills. It seemed destroying Petey Pirhana had gotten rid of all the vines, and caused all the remaining goo to disappear. On the one hand, this was very good; there wasn't any more of that disgusting gack to ruin F.L.U.D.D.'s day, the community was healthy and safe again, and the island was a little bit brighter for it. On the other hand, no goo meant F.L.U.D.D. had no idea where to look for Shadow Mario.

The island the Big Windmill sat on was one of the highest points in Bianco Hills, and still F.L.U.D.D. could not see any of the gack anywhere. The whole valley was at peace and flourish, without a care in the world. "Not good" the little robot thought to itself.

F.L.U.D.D. made its way back towards the main town, hoping it would be attacked by the time the robot arrived. No such luck though; instead it just found Piantas milling about the town, going through their everyday routine, except those who would be working at the Big Windmill of course.

It continued to wander the streets aimlessly until a Pianta woman with red hair recognized the robot from when she was picking fruit earlier that morning.

"Hey you, little boy!" she called out to F.L.U.D.D., basket full of bananas by her side. "Are you the one who got rid of those all those awful plants?"

"Yes" replied F.L.U.D.D. without a trace of enthusiasm in its voice. It had only done what it was programmed to do, so it was no big deal. "Have you seen a strange man with-"

"Oh my gosh!" gasped the woman, dropping her basket where she stood. "Hey guys, this is the little boy who saved the town" she called out to everyone within earshot.

"Actually I am not a boy, and-" F.L.U.D.D. tried to interject, but was quickly overwhelmed by the growing crowd.

"Excuse me, but I must return to my assigned task immediately" it said, trying to push through the crowd.

"No way" the fruit picker told F.L.U.D.D as she grabbed its plastic hand. "We're not letting you go anywhere until we've given".

The crowd dragged the kicking robot all the way to town hall, the largest building in the village. There was a very large table inside that they used for town meetings, and the mob sat the petite machine at its head and began the ceremony.

Musicians began strumming away at their sitars, creating a series of noises that F.L.U.D.D. recognized to be "music". Many of the Piantas brought fruit and vegetables with them, and piled them all into a large bowl to begin chopping up. After several minutes of hard labor, the main chef finally finished. He turned the bowl towards F.L.U.D.D. and revealed a Shine sprite made entirely out of different fruits, mostly pineapple and bananas, resting in a bed of lettuce leaves.

"Ta-da! The hero's feast!" said the woman who picked up the robot.

F.L.U.D.D. had no idea how to react to a situation like this, and just sat there for over a minute waiting for something to happen.

"Well aren't you going to eat it?" asked someone from the crowd.

"Oh yes, of course" the robot replied nervously, and then picked up a fork. It took a single slice of banana from the salad and placed its mouth, but didn't chew the fruit. F.L.U.D.D. had no teeth and no digestive tract, so the banana was eventually just shuffled into the robot's main water tank and just floated there, visible to the crowd from F.L.U.D.D.'s clear midriff. A bitter silence descended upon the room, as the Bianco Hills residents quickly became terrified of the alien yet again.

F.L.U.D.D. judged that it would be best just come clean and tell them exactly what was going on. "I am very sorry, but I am a robot, and robots do not require food as sustenance".

"Oh. Well, is there anything we could do to show our thanks? Is there anything you want?" asked the Pianta woman.

That was a very good question. What did F.L.U.D.D. want? It thought it wanted to help free Mario, but was that because the robot was just programmed that way? It liked to think its affection for the man who saved it was genuine, but how could it really tell?

"I am designed to serve, not to be served" F.L.U.D.D. finally said. "Do you have any ecological disasters that need to be cleaned?"

"No, you kinda took care of all that" she pointed out.

"How about juice spills? Stains? Messy children? Have any rock stars recently passed through your village?" F.L.U.D.D. asked desperately.

By now, most of the crowd had gone away, leaving the two of them there alone. "No, not at all. Don't you do anything to relax? Have fun?" asked the very intrusive woman.

"No…I guess I never really tried, though I have only been activated for a few days" said F.L.U.D.D., its processors straining to process the problems given to it.

"Well, I could try to show you a good time, if you let me" the tomato haired woman said tentatively. This whole situation seemed so bizarre, like out of a science fiction movie or something. She half expected the childlike machine to start asking about the Blue Fairy, or for the government to burst in and take it away.

F.L.U.D.D. considered her offer for precisely one second before dismissing it. The humanoid machine couldn't risk wasting its time, lest Shadow Mario escape its grasp forever. "I am sorry, but I must decline your offer. Tell me; if a fugitive came to Bianco Hills, where is the place they would most likely go to avoid detection?"

The woman wasn't sure if she was relieved or disappointed, but took a few moments to consider the question either way.

"I guess there's that old hillside cave by the river. No one ever goes in there, and for good reason; there are bats everywhere. I guess that would make it the perfect evil hideout, though…" she answered.

"Thank you" F.L.U.D.D. said as quickly as it could before giving the woman a quick kiss on the cheek, and running back outside.

Once it was back in the east side of town, it didn't take long for F.L.U.D.D. to find the cave, but it took it much longer to be able to reach it. The cave itself was a like a large olive on the mozzarella hillside on the other side of the river, but hill was way too steep for robot to climb by itself. There appeared to be some windmills on the lake nearby, though, that F.L.U.D.D. could use to reach it.

F.L.U.D.D. ran back over to the bridge leading to the Big Windmill and used it to jump onto the smaller windmills bellow. Walking along the power cables like tightropes was hard, especially with the strong wind, but the robot was eventually able to reach the other side without a problem.

One backflip up a final ledge later, F.L.U.D.D. finally stood outside the entrance of the cave. It was very dark inside, but thankfully all Gadd electronics were equipped with flashlights for situations like this. F.L.U.D.D. replaced its left hand with the flashlight, and its right hand with the squirt nozzle, and slowly made its way inside.

There really wasn't much to see inside the cave; stalactites, stalagmites, large piles of guano, but no sign of the missing Shadow Mario or his creations. F.L.U.D.D. thought for a moment that it just found another dead end, but then its cameras detected motion on the ceiling. The robot looked up to investigate, causing the movement to become even more frantic.

The fruit bats of Bianco Hills all took off from their perches simultaneously, screeching and howling at the cave's sudden intruder. Both F.L.U.D.D. and the small creatures mutually panicked and flailed about, eventually causing F.L.U.D.D. to trip and fall over into a large pile of bat guano.

The bats eventually flew out of the cave and out into Bianco Hills, leaving F.L.U.D.D. alone in the cave, once again covered in muck. "Ew! It's so disgusting! It's everywhere!" it said while it spayed and wiped itself off. "…yay!" it said much more quietly to itself.

In its frenzied attempt to clean itself, much of F.L.U.D.D.'s water got all over the cave and started dissolving many of the piles of guano. One large pile in particular started to glow the more it was dowsed with fluid.

F.L.U.D.D. noticed this and deactivated its flashlight. It sprayed at the pile until it completely melted away, revealing a Shine Sprite that completely lit up the cave. "The suspect must have hidden it here for safekeeping" deduced the robot.

A few moments later, the Shine Sprite jetted out of the cave and back towards its home of the Shine Gate. F.L.U.D.D. still wasn't any closer to finding Shadow Mario, but now there was one less Shine Sprite to worry about at least. The android recalibrated its GPS back towards the main town to charge for the night.

"Perhaps the perpetrator managed to escape" thought F.L.U.D.D. "I will have to check the internet to ensure he was not spotted elsewhere".


	8. Chapter 7: Trouble in Windmill Village

In Delfino Plaza, the stars were so dim they could barely be seen. What once were glittering grapes of the velvet sky were now just raisins scattered about mud. Nights at Isle Delfino were normally serene, glittering, and contemplative, but not tonight.

That wasn't to say that Delfino Plaza was dark, though. The lights of the city still shown through the night, and stubborn vacationers refused to let the island's quarantine ruin their good time.

A large crowd of loud, partying Goombas worked their way through the halls of the Corona Mountainside Hotel, all them drunk and worn out from the last few hours on the beach. Many of them were covered fangs to toe with glow sticks and temporary tattoos, and they were trying desperately to keep up with the song blaring from someone's boom box. Goomsa stumbled from the crowd towards her room and, with great effort, unlocked the front door.

"See'ya guys! Seriously, I had a great time!" she said as she waved goodbye and shut the door behind her.

"Would you guys please keep it down out there? Some of us are trying to work" Goombella said as she sat at her desk, only looking up from her books for a second.

"Hey, you!" Goomsa slurred. "You missed out, girl. It was totally trippendicular". Goomsa then unceremoniously flopped down onto her bed facefirst like a used banana peel and let out a large yawn.

"I bet it was, but I'm totally swamped right now" Goombella said as she turned yet another page in her law book. "The appeal is scheduled for the day after tomorrow, and I'm not even halfway through this monster. Then there are all my projects that I need to do and scholarships to apply for…"

"Augh, this always happens!" moaned Goomsa, now sitting up in her bed. "I try to take you somewhere to have fun, and you just bog yourself down in work!"

"That's not true…" began Goombella, but Goomsa stopped the overzealous student in her tracks.

"Yes it is!" said Goomsa. "Do you remember back in first grade when we went to that amusement park and you spent the whole day helping the engineers?"

"I saved your life!" retorted Goombella. "They so did not know what they were doing".

"Uh huh" Goomsa grunted back, unconvinced. "What about that time in fifth grade when you snuck away from camp to go to summer school?"

"Gag me with a spoon" said Goombella, sticking out her tongue and wincing. "Like I was going to be stuck in stuffy cabin with a bunch of dweebs all summer".

"Yeah, right" Goomsa said, waving her hand dismissively. "What about that time you ditched me and your date prom to do extra credit in calculus you didn't even need!"

"Uh, well you can never be too prepared for a test…" Goombella said, burying her head in her book like a potato to avoid looking at her roommate. Goomsa didn't say anything, and just sat there with a Cheshire grin spread across her face.

"Well, whatever! That doesn't matter" Goombella said, throwing down her book. "My friend's in trouble, and I'm not letting him down".

"Fer sure" Goomsa smugly quipped, taking a moment afterwards to soak up her victory. "It's such a shame that you lock yourself up like this. You and your bodacious Betty bod could make you queen of the school if you knew how to use it".

"Nah, I couldn't do that" Goombella said, blushing like a beat. "Besides, the real queens of the world study hard like me. I'll have plenty of time to do fun stuff when I'm done".

"It's always next time with you!" Goomsa said, flipping back onto her stomach. "You'll never get to have any fun if you keep putting it off".

Goombella didn't say a word though, and just turned another page. "Ugh, well would you at least go to bed! I can't sleep with that light on" Goomsa whined.

"Fine, you little baby" Goombella teased. She got up from her desk, reached towards the light switch and, with that, all the lights went out.

* * *

Suddenly, all the lights went out. The little hillside town was shimmering in the night like every other town on the island, electronic lights glittering on the smooth flowing water of the nearby river, when, without any warning, it all went black.

F.L.U.D.D. went back to town to charge itself for the night, and managed to charge 50.2223% before the power was suddenly cut. While the little robot was fortunately not in shutdown mode while it was charging, the unexpected loss of power nearly caused its system to crash. A quick reboot later, F.L.U.D.D. unplugged itself from the nearby wall and began to assess the situation.

F.L.U.D.D. couldn't find anything in the news on Shadow Mario, and suspected that the perpetrator was still hiding somewhere in Bianco Hills. Those suspicions seemed to be confirmed as F.L.U.D.D. stepped out onto the street and saw what was going on.

Every single windmill in that village was stopped dead in its tracks, chocking the village from its only power source. The android turned on its flashlight and shined it onto one of the windmills directly above the town hall. Its gears were jammed with sticky mud graffiti, which jerked the entire mechanism to halt, displaced gears, and cut off F.L.U.D.D. from its much needed power source.

However, the wind kept blowing regardless, causing the windmill to loudly groan under the strain. If someone didn't fix these things fast, they'd probably end up breaking permanently.

"Hey what's going on out here? I'm trying to sleep!" called one of the village residents. F.L.U.D.D.

A green haired Pianta stumbled from one of the nearby houses in his white pajamas, tiredly rubbing the sleep from his eyes. It wasn't long before other villagers who heard the windmills creaking came out, and began to gather in the dark streets. F.L.U.D.D. was the only thing left in town still shining light, so they naturally gathered like moths to a flame.

"Your windmills appear to no longer be functioning" F.L.U.D.D. tried to explain to the growing crowd. "As they are vital in aiding my current objective, I will attempt to repair them. Please return to your homes".

The robot then tried to shoo them away like a pack of stray cats, and most of them went on their way. A few stayed, however, and watched as F.L.U.D.D. began to climb up town hall to get better access to its large windmill.

The android started cleaning out the gears with its hose when its audio sensors detected someone speaking.

"I knew this would happen eventually. Machines are so unreliable, you can't trust them to do anything" a Pianta said loudly to his neighbor. F.L.U.D.D. quickly stopped what it was doing and turned to face the man.

"This isn't their fault" F.L.U.D.D. called down, speakers on high. "They were sabotaged; you should be angry at whoever did this, not at the innocent machine".

"Yeah, whatever" he called back. "Just get the stupid things working again so I can watch TV!"

The man walked back over to his house and slammed the front door behind him, and F.L.U.D.D. went back to work cleaning the windmill.

"Don't worry, he didn't mean it" F.L.U.D.D. whispered to its fellow machine as it washed the disgusting goop away. "I'll make you and your friends as good as new, okay?"

The windmill didn't say anything back, and only groaned as the wind continued to put strain on its unaligned gears. F.L.U.D.D. made a note in its hard drive that it should try to minimize rusting as much as possible and continued to clean the windmill.

* * *

It took F.L.U.D.D. almost the entire night, but eventually it managed to repair every windmill in the village. The automaton ran around the village like a motorized gardener in a mechanical orchard, constantly resetting gears and cleaning away graffiti one windmill at a time.

Eventually the robot's quest brought it to the highest windmill in the village, standing atop a pole several stories higher than any of the buildings. It had to climb on top several other windmills, tightrope over dozens of power lines, and get nearly blown off by the wind several times, but eventually F.L.U.D.D. made it.

By that time, its power levels were nearly depleted from all the activity, but the little robot refused to give up. It was going to finish the repairs even if it was the last thing it did.

F.L.U.D.D. had just enough time to finish repairing the final windmill when its power source ran out, and the android began to shut down. With that the power to the village was restored, and the final lights in town turned on just in time to see the coming sunrise.

If F.L.U.D.D. could feel, it would have felt like it had run a marathon, or trampled by a thousand horses, but it would have felt satisfied with its work as well. Soon, its cameras began to shut down along with the rest of its systems. Right before it shut down completely, F.L.U.D.D. would have sworn it heard the shimmering of a Shine Sprite as it flew back to Delfino Plaza.


	9. Chapter 8: Petey Piranha Strikes Back

The sun once again raised itself over Delfino Plaza, a little brighter than the previous day, to let everyone know that a brand new day had started.

Still, the sun was still quite pale and dim; you didn't even need to wear sunglasses when going outside, and many vacationers were saving a bundle of coins on sunscreen. Goombella probably wouldn't have even noticed that it was daylight out if she didn't leave her window open all night.

The rays shined through into her and Goomsa's hotel room and sprinkled onto Goombella's eyes, eventually forcing them to open. She rubbed them a few times before getting out of bed and heading straight towards her desk and books.

About half an hour later, Goomsa began to stir as well, and saw Goombella working tirelessly at her desk. "Mhm, how long have you been up?" Goomsa groaned.

"Not long" Goombella replied curtly. "Around 25 minutes, I'd say".

"And you're already working? Aren't you going to at least eat breakfast?" Goomsa asked. Goombella just pointed at the pile of jerky rappers and soda cans next to her desk and kept reading.

"Augh, could you at least do me a favor and bathe a little bit? You're grody to the max right now, and I don't want our room getting fumigated" Goomsa begged.

"What?" said Goombella. "It hasn't been that long since I showered. It's been…" She looked at the clock on her desk and began calculating, but remained silent even when she knew the answer. "Well, that's none of your business anyway. I'll shower before I go to court, so I'll be fine until then" Goombella said defensively.

"Augh, barf me out! Let me know when you're ready to rejoin the Goomba race, okay?" Goomsa said before heading over to the bathroom. Despite what she said, she hadn't given up on Goombella quite yet. She was going to give Goombella a good time even if it killed her.

* * *

The world suddenly came back into view for F.L.U.D.D. as its batteries reached 100% charge and someone began booting up its systems. Its cameras reactivated and began scanning its environment. It was plugged into a power outlet by the river on the southern edge of Windmill Village, and a Pianta man with blue hair was standing over it. F.L.U.D.D.'s internal clock updated, and revealed it to be 11:45:36:54 AM.

"Oh thank goodness, I thought you'd never finish charging" said the familiar man standing over it. "We need your help, right now!"

"What is your emergency?" asked F.L.U.D.D., standing up and preparing its squirt nozzle.

"After you finished repairing all the windmills, we were suddenly attacked by this giant plant monster! He practically tore the town apart, and covered everything in that evil goop!"

F.L.U.D.D. looked around the corner of the building he was plugged into, and it was true; many of the buildings were on the verge of collapse, several of the windmills the robot just repaired were torn down, and the entire hillside was plastered in mud graffiti. Several Pianta trees could be seen sticking out from the goo in several places.

"He asked where you were, but we didn't know. Eventually he just got frustrated and climbed over the cliffs on the north side of town" explained the Pianta.

"What about me?" asked F.L.U.D.D.

"Huh?" responded the man, confused.

"You clarified what befell the town and its residents, but what about me? Why is it that I am no longer atop a windmill, and that the 'plant monster' did not find me?" asked F.L.U.D.D.

"Oh, well I think he knocked down the windmill you were on and accidently tossed you into the river. That's where I found you, and I got you to the nearest working outlet I could find" said the Pianta man.

"You saved me? Why? I thought you did not like me" F.L.U.D.D. wondered aloud, just as confused as ever.

"Yeah…" replied the man, trying to think of an adequate answer. "But I hate that monster even more, and you're the only one who could beat him".

That reply made sense to the robot; he was just saving himself, not F.L.U.D.D. Chances were the man still hated the android for what it did, and things would return to normal between them as soon as this crisis passed.

F.L.U.D.D. was about to set off to fight Petey Piranha yet again, but the man kept talking. "You've been helping us quite a bit as well, and…well…you didn't deserve to rust down there".

F.L.U.D.D. stopped in its tracks, unsure of what to say next. "Thank you" it finally said, putting a wide smile on the man's face.

"But all my parts are rust resistant" finished F.L.U.D.D. before running off into the fray.

Its first priority was to save the villagers currently ensnared in the mud graffiti, and find out if any of them could be useful in fighting the giant hiding in the Bianco Hills. One by one they popped out of the ground like potatoes and F.L.U.D.D. cleaned them off.

Unfortunately for F.L.U.D.D., none of them told the robot anything it didn't already know, and absolutely none of them were willing to help fight Petey head on. Some offered money up in gratitude, but the android turned them down each time. What was it going to do with money? Buy fruit?

Eventually F.L.U.D.D. came across someone willing to do something more than just encourage the robot.

"I'd love to help you out, but there's no way I'd make it up those cliffs" explained the tan haired, muscle bound man. "But you on the other hand…"

"Why are you looking at me like that?" asked F.L.U.D.D.

Before even the processors of the robot could register what was going on, the Pianta picked the robot up and chucked it over his shoulders, towards the cliffs. F.L.U.D.D.'s sensors were quickly overloaded by changing information, which made a graceful landing impossible.

"Aaaaahh!" it screamed as it flew through the air, pneumatic limbs flailing in all directions in a panic. Its cries where swiftly silenced by a speaker full of mud graffiti as it landed on the top of the cliff, face first.

F.L.U.D.D. tried its best not to break out into more screams, and quickly dowsed itself and the surrounding cliff top in water. It strongly hoped it would never have to meet someone like that again.

Once it was done cleaning, the robot focused its cameras to the other side of the cliff. In front of it stood a small wooden fence, blocking an enormous canyon on the other side.

The android's cameras estimated it to be at least 31.3 meters deep and 10.4 meters wide, and appeared to be the source of the river that encircled much of Bianco Hills. Standing erect in the center of it was a small white mesa, about six feet diameter. Sitting there on top of it, seemingly asleep, was Petey Piranha in the flesh. He had dug himself a small hot tub of mud graffiti on top of the mesa, with roots extending down into the canyon waters below.

F.L.U.D.D. was once again stumped as to what to do next, because even with its hover nozzle, there was no way the robot was going to reach the mesa. It began calculating all the possible ways it could make it to Petey, but none of them successfully computed. Then, suddenly something occurred to F.L.U.D.D.

"Maybe if he got himself over there, he can bring himself back as well" it thought. "But how am I going to get the monster's attention?"

As if in answer to its question, F.L.U.D.D. began to hear what sounded like bouncing rubber balls. It looked over and herd of bouncing pink balls, each with eyes, freckles, and a puckered orange mouth.

"What in the world?" thought F.L.U.D.D. as it walked over to inspect the strange creatures. Before it could reach them, however, they suddenly started bouncing towards F.L.U.D.D., and ganged up on the little robot.

"Augh, get off!" F.L.U.D.D. cried, trying to escape. It tried to run away, but, like sharks with blood in the water, the strange pig creatures wouldn't let up. Eventually one of them found the android's plastic lips and latched on, which dispersed the other creatures.

F.L.U.D.D. was both relieved and annoyed by this turn of events. "What do these things want?" it thought. "And why won't it come off!"

Tug as it might, the robot couldn't dislodge its locked lips, making this the second worst kiss F.L.U.D.D. had ever had. The robot had plenty of time to check its databases though, and discovered these "poink" creatures loved gorging themselves on fresh water. Giving up, F.L.U.D.D. decided to give the thing what it wanted.

It opened the lock connecting its mouth with its water tank and began pumping the creature full of water. Eventually the pressure was too much and caused the poink to rocket off into the distance, but another one took its place as soon as it was gone. F.L.U.D.D. was becoming more and more frustrated when it noticed the poinks flew oddly straight when launched…

Making the best of its situation, F.L.U.D.D. walked over to the cliff-side fence and took aim at Petey Piranha's head. The poink flew true, and struck the side of his head with a loud thwack. Slowly, the plant man began to wake itself.

"Yes!" thought F.L.U.D.D. "Now he'll have to come over here".

Red green roots suddenly exploded from the ground around F.L.U.D.D. without any warning and wrapped themselves around the androids legs. They lifted it up and carried it across the canyon towards Petey Piranha, who had a wide grin on his face as his little lemon was carried toward him.

"Well, well, look who decided to make an appearance" Petey said, lowering the still restrained robot into his pool. "I thought for a moment there you weren't going to show up at all, and that I wouldn't be able to…repay you for what you did earlier".

F.L.U.D.D.'s circuits were aflame with a dozen different shades of panic. It was captured by the enemy, helpless, about to be dismantled, and waist deep inside that disgusting goop that had been plaguing F.L.U.D.D. since it arrived on this awful island.

"I knew you'd come crawling back to me though" he continued, gesturing towards himself with his leafy arms. "Like a forbidden fruit, I was just too tempting".

"How…how are you still here?" asked F.L.U.D.D., its curiosity briefly overcoming its terror.

"A good piece of art never dies" he replied, shrugging off the fact that he exploded the last time F.L.U.D.D. saw him.

"What does that mean?" F.L.U.D.D. wondered, but did not have much time to think about it.

"Anyways, I don't think I'll give you the chance to surprise me like last time, so before crack your little head open on the canyon wall, do you have any last words?"

F.L.U.D.D. struggled as hard as it could against its bonds, but they simply wouldn't budge. Even if it managed to get out its squirt nozzles, they wouldn't be at an angle to do any real damage. F.L.U.D.D. had to think of something to say quickly, before its parts were ground into mulch.

"…I am sorry" F.L.U.D.D. finally said.

"Aww, I'm sorry too" Petey replied mockingly. "Sorry you wasted your last words!"

He then began to raise F.L.U.D.D. up out of the tub with his roots, preparing to throw it into the side of the gorge as hard as he could.

"Wait, I mean it" F.L.U.D.D. called out desperately. "I should have never challenged your magnificence. I should have known I was no match for someone as strong as you".

"Go on", replied Petey Piranha, deciding to indulge himself a little bit.

"Your muscles are so thick, and my arms cannot even break these small vines". Petey flexed his muscles at this, showing off his physique to the little robot.

"You were able to destroy an entire village by yourself, so what hope did a little toaster like me have in beating a titan like you?" asked F.L.U.D.D. Petey turned back towards Windmill Village in the distance and admired his handiwork.

"However, it has been an honor to know that I will have been destroyed by such a masterpiece of a man" F.L.U.D.D. finished, hoping beyond hope he'd spare the miniscule machine.

"As true as all that was, flattery will get you nowhere" Petey Piranha said with venom in his voice. He once again raised the android into the air to be smashed against the cold cauliflower stones of the Bianco Hills, and F.L.U.D.D. panicked

"I only regret not having seen your beautiful eyes before you throw me off into the abyss" it explained. "Will you at least look me in the eye before you kill me?"

The mud monster brought its rootss and F.L.U.D.D. closer to its face, but made sure to keep all its limbs restrained as he did so. The robot's gears and pumps slowly began churning inside, building up pressure.

"You don't need to see them" Petey said angrily. "After what you did last time, they're both black! And I am not falling for the same trick twi-"

He was suddenly cut off as F.L.U.D.D. fired water from its mouth, which rocketed straight into Petey's throat, causing him to choke.

"Oh, you little worm!" Petey shouted anrgrily, and tossed F.L.U.D.D. away with his roots. He failed to aim in his rage, however, and just sent the android back to the cliff he started on. Petey Piranha wasn't going to let the weasel get away though, and sent his roots out to recapture F.L.U.D.D.

F.L.U.D.D. knew what to expect now though, and dodged out of the way of each root strike, even the ones that came out of the ground. Eventually he gave up, and detached himself from his roots all together. He began to flap his leafy arms, catching a surprising amount of wind, and slowly lifted himself into the air.

The ridiculousness of a plant-man slowly flying through the air was not lost on even F.L.U.D.D., but neither was its gravity. If Petey reached Windmill Village, he'd wreak havoc all over again. The poinks were still bouncing around nearby, and F.L.U.D.D. called them over by shifting its hands into hose mode and firing a small stream of water.

Poinks quickly attatched themselves to each nozzle, and F.L.U.D.D. once again took aim at the putrid piranha flying above it. One by one it fired the poinks, each exploding in a burst of water in the air like a liquid flak round. Eventually one found its mark and struck the winged vegetable right in its left arm, causing him to spin out of control.

He let out one last screech as he plummeted into the river below, and hit the water with a deafening splash. F.L.U.D.D. looked down into the water below for any sign of him, but only saw dirty, muddy water. A bright light eventually began to reveal itself though, and a Shine Sprite raised itself from the water and flew off into the distance. Bianco Hills was safe for another day.

Or so the robot thought.

Once it got back to Windmill Village, instead of finding the villagers celebrating, they all had very somber looks on their faces, and were quietly talking to one another. As soon as they noticed F.L.U.D.D. they rushed over to it.

"Help, something horrible has happened!"


	10. Chapter 9: Secret of the Dirty Lake

"How may I be off assistance?" asked F.L.U.D.D, whose pristine face only reflected the light, but not the gravity, of the situation.

"The river…it's been poisoned!" said a blonde Pianta woman, approaching F.L.U.D.D. from the crowd.

"What?" asked F.L.U.D.D., suddenly agape at the news. If the only source of good, clean freshwater in the town was being tampered with, this really was a disaster. "How did this happen?"

"We don't know" the woman explained. "The Cliff Spring Cave suddenly just started spewing awful muck, and now the lake around the Big Windmill is ruined".

"Cliff Spring Cave?" F.L.U.D.D. inquired.

"Yeah, it's the other big tourist spot here besides the Windmill" explained someone else from the crowd.

"That's right" continued the blonde woman. "It's a natural hot spring, and we practically made a mint shipping tourists to and from the cave".

F.L.U.D.D. then began checking its pockets and other compartments, seemingly looking for something. When it didn't find it, the robot turned back towards the crowd and asked "May I still collect my reward for rescuing you from the graffiti?"

"What?" asked the banana blonde Pianta, before it suddenly struck her why the robot was asking her that question. "Oh, don't worry; you've more than earned a free ride".

"Uh, I don't think anyone is getting a ride today" someone said in the distance.

* * *

F.L.U.D.D. and the crowd followed the voice over to the side of the polluted lake/river, but all they found was a Pianta man with brown hair standing alone by the side of the putrid lake.

"Is there something wrong, Renaldo?" asked one of the villagers. "What happened to the boats?"

"They're right here" he responded, pointing into the water.

It took a moment for them to see anything because of how dark with sludge the water had become. It had turned a sickly green in color, with brown splotches spread throughout, and appeared to have the consistency of a banana smoothie that was neglected for about a week. It also reeked almost as badly as the mud graffiti, so most of the citizenry was reluctant to get closer to see what the man was pointing at.

F.L.U.D.D. tried its best to cover its nasal ports to stop the smell from overpowering the android, and took the first steps forward. Its cameras zoomed in on the water and saw what appeared to be a few pieces of blue plastic floating on the water. They quickly disappeared beneath the watery muck though, and F.L.U.D.D. reached its right hand in after it out of curiosity.

Its sensors in its robotic hand suddenly started going haywire though, and F.L.U.D.D. pulled back its arm to reveal its fingers melting away.

The crowd suddenly began panicking at this gruesome sight, and started screaming like they had just bit into a bad apple. The robot quickly disconnected its wrist, but otherwise remained calm.

"Don't worry" said F.L.U.D.D. while trying out its smiling tactic again to relax the crowd. "I'll just get another one".

The android's processors connected to Gadd Science Inc.'s website and informed its manufacturer of the damage. Thankfully F.L.U.D.D. had a six month warranty, which meant that they would replace any broken part free of charge, though only once per part. Until then, it would have to make do with a squirt nozzle for a hand.

"That's exactly what happened to the boats!" exclaimed Renaldo. "They just started dissolving, and now there's nothing left!"

F.L.U.D.D. directed its cameras towards the lake and zoomed in over towards the mouth of the Cliff Spring Cave and noticed that there were several logs floating in front of it, seemingly unharmed.

The robot turned back towards Renaldo and asked "What were the boats constructed from?"

"Plastic" he said back. "Why?"

This was even worse than F.L.U.D.D. originally calculated; if it didn't stop the muck from pouring from the springs, the robot would quickly lose its only way to fight back against the graffiti creatures, and would probably end up being overwhelmed. There was practically no way for it to reach the thing cave either, at least without completely dissolving away.

This storm cloud might just have a silver lining though; if he was trying so hard to keep the robot out of that cave, Shadow Mario was almost certainly hiding there.

If there was a chance, it had to try.

Nearby there were several large lily pads sitting on the near stagnant lake water, and had been turned the color of rotten lettuce by toxic water. F.L.U.D.D. tentatively took a step out onto one, hover nozzles at the ready in case the android needed to make an emergency exit. The pad managed to hold its weight just fine, and F.L.U.D.D. started using its squirt nozzle to propel itself through the water.

"Wait, what are you doing?" called someone back on dry land.

"I've got to get to the cave" F.L.U.D.D. called back, though it was too busy paying attention to where it was steering the makeshift boat to face whoever asked that question.

While the robot was programmed to do many different things, piloting a dinghy like this wasn't one of them, and so controlling which way lily pad went was like peeling a pineapple by hand. It was fine as long as it didn't hit anything though, and, aside from a few windmill poles, the surface of the lake was obstacle free.

However, it didn't take F.L.U.D.D. long to notice its lily pad was browning like a banana, and begin dissolving as well. Even though the goo was made to destroy plastic, it still wasn't agreeing with the plant and the robot's added weight was not helping. There were some more lily pads floating nearby, but F.L.U.D.D. wasn't sure it'd be able to reach them in time.

"Maybe I'll short circuit before feel the goo" F.L.U.D.D. thought hopefully. The android activated its hover nozzles on its back and made its leap of faith over to the next pad.

F.L.U.D.D. managed to make it, but momentum from the jump sent the robot teetering on its mechanical toes on the edge of the pad, a centimeter away from falling into the dark and unforgiving waters. It fell back onto its cushioned posterior, and ran a diagnostic to make sure it didn't lose another piece on the way over.

When everything checked out, F.L.U.D.D. started up its squirt nozzle again and pushed itself the final few yards over towards the mouth of the cave. When it was close enough, F.L.U.D.D. leapt onto one of the logs floating around the cave, and then quickly rocketed itself into the cave with its hover nozzle.

The inside of the Cliff Spring Cave was naturally very similar to the hillside cave F.L.U.D.D. had searched earlier, with many stalactites and stalagmites everywhere. However, the cave was much more open and large than the bat filled pod the robot previously explored, and much brighter. While the springs were left largely intact, bright lights were set up everywhere to help stop bathers from tripping over themselves.

They also helped to showcase the white stone walls of the cave that helped give the Bianco Hills its name, but F.L.U.D.D. could barely make any of it out because the springs were so covered in muck. F.L.U.D.D. managed to find an untouched stalagmite and quickly landed on it before the android's hover nozzle gave out and ruined all the progress it had made.

It scanned every inch of the cave that it could with its cameras, but it couldn't find the source of the goo anywhere; just lots of polluted water slowly flowing out from the cave. Something inside F.L.U.D.D.'s head clicked though, and suddenly it knew where all the poison was coming from.

A spot behind some stalagmites seemed to be glowing red, though F.L.U.D.D.'s sensors indicated that what it saw was not on the visible spectrum of light. The robot blinked its eyes in confusion, and suddenly the light seemed to disappear.

"Since when could I do that?" F.L.U.D.D. wondered. Whatever that function was, F.L.U.D.D. didn't activate it voluntarily.

F.L.U.D.D.'s confusion didn't last long, however, as it suddenly felt compelled to ignore its worry and focus on the task at hand.

A few careful jumps from stalagmite to stalagmite later, the robot found itself standing above what appeared to be a miniature goop generator, just like one of the several it had fought during its first few days on the island. It didn't start fighting back when F.L.U.D.D. opened fire on the little poison apple though, and just started dissolving away. The perpetrator obviously did not expect F.L.U.D.D. to make it that close to the thing.

As the miniature monster melted away, the goo started to dry up and disappear, leaving the cave as spotless as it usually was. Soon, the water outside started to clear up too, and the crowd of Piantas that had been standing terrified by the lake let out a collective sigh of relief. They weren't going to run out of fresh water any time soon now.

As the goop generator melted away, the Shine Sprite at its heart revealed itself and its glistening beauty to the cave. The bright white walls of the caves combined with the Sprite's blinding glow caused F.L.U.D.D.'s cameras to actually shut themselves down to stop its processors from being overloaded. This was enough to cause F.L.U.D.D. to make it fall from its perch though, and the android plummeted several feet to the ground.

F.L.U.D.D. finally caught a break though, and landed in one of the spring pools instead of on the steel hard ground. Once the Sprite had returned to Delfino Plaza, the android calmly swam its way back to the surface and began searching the cave for any trace of Shadow Mario.

It found itself entirely alone however; no monsters, no Piantas, no perpetrators, no anything. Just itself, the light and the water.

Though F.L.U.D.D. was very disappointed, there was nothing to do now but charge and wait for the replacement hand to arrive. F.L.U.D.D. quickly headed back out to the entrance of the caving, not bothering to really take in the beauty around it; it had to start swimming back now if the robot was going to make it back in time to start charging.

* * *

Goombella was still reading away at her desk by the time the sun began to set. She would have kept reading too, but she had long run out of jerky and her stomach was becoming quite loud and demanding.

Deciding she had no choice, Goombella headed outside to see if there were any good cafes around that she could grab a quick bite from.

"Hey, Goombella!" called a voice behind her as she walked the streets of Delfino Plaza.

It wasn't long before Goomsa had practically tackled Goombella, and forced her into a tight hug. "I thought I'd never see you away from those lame books!" she exclaimed.

"Yeah, well don't get used to it girl" Goombella said as she wiggled her way from Goomsa's grip.

"Aww, don't tell me you're still not ready for that trial!" Goomsa wined, exasperated. "I'd of thought you'd know every law every made by now".

"It's not just about laws, it's also about court procedures, local customs, and lawyer tactics" explained Goombella, but Goomsa didn't seem to understand any of it.

"It means I can't afford to leave anything out!" said Goombella. "Mario's counting on me…"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah" Goomsa said dismissively. "You have to save your Baldwin crush Mario from the eeeevil jail, and protect him in the safety of your pants".

"Th-that's not true" Goombella said, lighting up like a tomato.

"Puh-lease, you've been head over heels since before you even met the guy" teased Goomsa. "I wonder how he'd react to all that dirty fanfiction you wrote when you were 13…"

"Whatever, I'm getting back to work!" Goombella said, turning back towards the hotel.

Goomsa wasn't about to let that happen though, and grabbed Goombella by the shoulder.

"You're not going anywhere" she explained. "We're having a big party over by the Shine Gate, and I'm not going without you".

Despite Goombella's protests, Goomsa took Goombella by the hand and started dragging her towards the pier directly below the Shine Gate. There, a dozen of their fellow college students were playing in the water, tossing each other around, and drinking lots and lots of alcohol.

"I'm sorry Goomsa, but I don't want to show up in court smelling like beer!" Goombella said as she made one last effort to escape Goomsa's grip.

"Oh, so you'd rather show up smelling like grody pig?"Goomsa asked. Goombella took a few whiffs of herself, and even she had to admit she was beginning to smell a bit rank.

"Here, let me wash you off!"

Goomsa then threw Goombella as hard as she could into the salty water below, causing Goombella's ponytail to become undone in the process. Goombella swam her way back to the surface, and marveled at how good the water felt on her skin.

"Maybe I could stay a little while…"


	11. Chapter 10: Shadow Mario on the Loose

"Ugh, my head" moaned Goombella, clutching tightly at her forehead. "Just what did I do last night?"

The dull yellow sun once again raised itself over Delfino Plaza, much to Goombella's ire. Even in its weakened state, it gave the blonde Goomba a horrible throbbing headache that simply wouldn't go away. The young college student had absolutely no idea where she was, or what exactly she did the previous night.

She eventually opened her eyes enough to see that she was still on the pier at the foot of the shine gate, but much higher up than she should have been. She looked down and saw she was sitting atop a makeshift square pyramid over nine feet tall and made entirely out of foam pool toys and beer cans. All around her lay her fellow classmates, mostly men, who presumably helped her build it.

"OMG, did I really just?..." Goombella asked out loud.

Her answer came in the form of a digital camera in her lap, which she quickly turned on and discovered what happened yesterday. The phone was loaded with pictures of the pyramid from different angles and perspectives, as well as dozens of Goombas bowing before her like she was a pharaoh.

"…yep, I did my homework while I was at a party. I'm such a dork!" Goombella said, smacking her empty coconut for emphasis and making her headache even worse.

But suddenly something occurred to her; she had spent the entire night at the party instead of getting ready for the trial, and she didn't even know what time it was. With the grace of a startled cow, Goombella leapt off the top of the pyramid and grabbed the wrist of a random Pianta with a watch who was passing by.

"10:45" she said, ignoring the startled gasps of the man she just latched onto. "I've only got ten minutes to get there!"

With that, she ran straight back to her hotel room to gather up her books. After digging through all her books and papers for a minute, she finally found them and headed out the door. As she ran through the streets, she realized she was still just in her bikini, and that she needed to be at least slightly presentable before the judge.

She quickly grabbed onto and stole the grass skirt off some unsuspecting red haired Pianta woman and tried to put it on as she ran. "Hey!" yelled the now half nude woman, trying to cover herself the best she could.

"Sorry, but this is an emergency!" Goombella said as she fastened the red skirt around her waist while trying her best not to drop her books.

As she passed by the fruit market on her way to the courtroom, Goombella realized that she hadn't had anything to eat or drink besides beer since the previous day, and her stomach loudly growled to remind her of that. Even if she had money though, she couldn't stop to eat; Mario was counting on her!

* * *

Meanwhile, in the courtroom of town hall, the judge was starting to get impatient for Mario's lawyer to finally show up.

"Mr. Mario, if your attorney does not arrive in the next five minutes, then I will have no choice but to assign you the public defender instead" she said in her loud, intimidating voice.

Peach, who was sitting in the stands directly behind Mario, asked as quietly as she could "Where is she? I thought you said that she'd finally be able to get you out of this mess".

"Don't worry Peach, she'll be here" he said confidently. There was no way she was going to let him down at time like this, and he knew it.

"'scuse me, pardon me" said someone towards the back of the courtroom.

Goombella suddenly came bursting through the doors into the courtroom, books and legal papers in hand, and smelling like she just rolled around in a bushel of hops.

The entire courtroom, Mario included, gawked at the sight before them. Her hair was an absolute mess, and she was so sloppily dressed Goombella looked more like tossed fruit salad than a lawyer.

An audible silence filled the room and Goombella tried her best to reach her seat next to Mario as dignified as she could. She and Mario exchanged nervous glances, but didn't say anything.

"Alright then" said the judge, banging her gavel. "Court is now in session!"

* * *

F.L.U.D.D. once again found itself charging with an outlet in the town hall; after saving all their lives twice in one day, it was the least the denizens of Bianco Hills could do to repay the little robot. Suddenly the robot started to beep and unplug itself, though not because it had fully charged yet; a replacement hand had finally arrived from Gadd Science Inc., and F.L.U.D.D. wanted to go get it as soon as possible.

It stepped outside, looked up into the sky, and saw and airplane flying off into the distance with something parachuting down behind it. It was a large white crate with blue edges and the Gadd Science logo, a mostly bald scientist's head, imbued on each side. Judging by the current wind-speed velocity and the direction it was headed, F.L.U.D.D. calculated it would most likely land over by the side of the river nearby.

F.L.U.D.D. walked over to the river near the entrance of the village and patiently waited for the box to gently float down. As soon as it hit the ground though, F.L.U.D.D. suddenly felt a huge weight land upon its head.

F.L.U.D.D.'s face quickly met the ground, and whatever it was that did that jumped forwards towards the crate. The robot righted itself as quickly as it could, and saw none other than Shadow Mario himself picking up the crate and running off.

"Oh no, he must have been waiting on the building behind me this whole time!" thought F.L.U.D.D. as it took off in pursuit.

The pair once again found themselves in a game of cat-and-mouse as F.L.U.D.D. chased the perpetrator around Windmill Village. F.L.U.D.D. had the advantage this time, however, as Shadow Mario was weighed down by the huge blue and white cube in its arms. While it was grateful that the package was cumbersome enough to slow the wrongdoer down, the little robot couldn't help but wonder why a package for a new hand had to be so large.

Just because he was slowed down, however, didn't mean the mustachioed mastermind didn't have a few tricks up his sleeves. When it was clear the android wasn't going to give up, he back flipped up onto a rooftop and continued his escape above the village.

Below, shocked Piantas looked on as F.L.U.D.D. chased the man they had all heard so much about across town. Some fled in fear into their still ruined homes, while others yelled at the Shadow Mario in rage for nearly destroying their town over the last few days, but even the bravest Pianta couldn't reach the two of them so high above the streets.

The time F.L.U.D.D. spent repairing the windmills of the town made the robot very familiar with the architecture of the town, so even if it was damaged from Petey Piranha's attack, there was no way Shadow Mario was losing F.L.U.D.D. in town.

The perpetrator was making a jump onto the wall separating the town from the orchard to the east when F.L.U.D.D. saw its opportunity to take him down. The android leapt at the criminal like he was a low hanging fruit and tackled him, causing both of them to crash into ground on the other side.

F.L.U.D.D. was the first one back on its feet, and quickly pointed its squirt nozzle and the dazed bandit, whose head was buried in the ground like a turnip. He eventually pulled his head out from the grass only to see the android's hose mere inches from his face.

"I'm not letting you get away this time" F.L.U.D.D. stated confidently, though its processors couldn't actually calculate a way for F.L.U.D.D. as going to bring the man to the authorities when they were both so far from Delfino Plaza and all the robot had to threaten the man with was a water gun. Still, it had to at least give off the illusion of confidence if the robot was going to convince the man to cooperate.

Shadow Mario made a move to get up, but F.L.U.D.D. placed a light foot on his chest to show he wasn't going anywhere.

"You're going to pay for everything you've done!" F.L.U.D.D. said while trying not to puke out its circuits from the data it was receiving from its foot. The man felt like he was completely covered in slime, and his clothes seemed to react like mud to F.L.U.D.D. stepping on it.

"Me? I'm the victim here! I was only trying to save Princess Peach! But noooooo, you just had to screw it all up!" Shadow Mario shouted upwards in a high pitch voice.

This new information caused a jolt to F.L.U.D.D.'s circuits; save the Princess? She didn't need saving, and even if she did, why hurt all these innocent people in order to rescue her?

"Does this man really think he is Mario?" wondered F.L.U.D.D. as it ran hypothesis through its stressed processors.

This pause gave Shadow Mario enough time to rear up his legs and deliver a swift kick F.L.U.D.D.'s chest, launching the lightweight robot back a foot. The robot was prepared this time though, and quickly fired its squirt nozzle at the man before it could get away.

The effect was almost instantaneous as the water collided with Shadow Mario's gooey skin. It spasmed and twitched violently, and appeared let off steam as more and more water hit him. The perpetrator let out a yelp of pain and collapsed to the ground, unable to pick himself up.

"Of course, why did I not think of that before?" wondered F.L.U.D.D. "Everything else so far has reacted violently to water, it makes sense that this man would too…what an incredibly inconvenient weakness".

Choosing to believe the perpetrator was incapacitated, F.L.U.D.D. walked over to the nearby crate and sent out a radio signal to automatically open it. The sides of the box all gave way and flattened out onto the ground, and revealed the robots long awaited hand inside…and much brighter as well.

A Shine Sprite was hovering there above its new hand, twinkling brightly and once again overloading F.L.U.D.D. unprepared cameras, but also confusing the robot immensely.

"A Shine Sprite? Why would Gadd Science Inc. have a Shine Sprite?" it wondered.

Soon, however, the Shine Sprite was flying away to join its brethren in Delfino Plaza, leaving the confused android with many questions but no answers.

F.L.U.D.D. quickly realized it didn't have any time to ask questions though, as Shadow Mario had managed to pick himself up and was running back towards Windmill Village. F.L.U.D.D. fastened on its new hand as swiftly as it could, and took off, once again, in pursuit.

* * *

"…and that, your honor, is why the continued imprisonment of my client, Mario Mario, is completely unacceptable for a civilized society" finished Goombella.

Despite her crushing hangover, Goombella was still able to give a decent opening statement, and clearly had the support of the Piantas in the courtroom. By now, they had all seen or heard about Shadow Mario running around Delfino Plaza, and they were all very angry. They were told that the attacks would stop with Mario in jail, but now they seem to have only gotten worse. They were demanding answers, as well as justice for the actual criminal who was terrorizing their fair island.

The judge, however, didn't seem to care. She just sat there, head resting in her hand as she leaned against the arm of her chair. She appeared to have as much interest in what Goombella was saying as carnivore would for a pineapple. Finally, she realized Goombella was done speaking and sat up in her seat.

"Alright, and now for a statement from the prosecution" said the Judge as she straightened her white wig back over her green hair.

The same blue haired Pianta who put Mario in jail a week ago got up from his chair and approached the bench with a poster in hand.

"Would the defendant please approach the bench" he said.

Mario, under close watch from the bailiffs, did so and turned around the face the courtroom. The prosecutor then unfurled the poster to reveal it to be a wanted poster for Shadow Mario.

"As you can quite plainly see, this is the man who desecrated the island with his awful pollution" he said, calmly pointing to Mario and then back to the wanted poster.

"Well, that was all I needed to hear. I find the defendant sill guilty, and revoke his right to parole" the judge said before roughly banging her gavel. "Should have thought of that earlier" she whispered to herself.

Mario's face quickly slouched and he looked back down towards his feet. He honestly didn't know what he was expecting in such an insane island.

The crowd was still angry, but they were quickly forced out by police before they could start a full-scale riot. The judge wasn't afraid though; Piantas were used to rulings like this by now.

Peach managed to make her way to Mario, though, and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"It's okay Mario" she said in as comforting as voice as she could. "We'll keep fighting to get you out, no matter how long it takes".

"Thanks Peach, that makes me feel a little better" he said back. He would have hugged her as well, but the tight cuffs around his wrists made that impossible.

Goombella sullenly approached Mario as well, head hung in shame for failing to save her friend.

"I'm really, really sorry I couldn't get you out, dude" she said. "After I'd gotten your hopes up too…"

"Hey-a now, you tried your best" said Mario.

"That's right" agreed Princess Peach. "You made a wonderful speech, even if your entrance was a bit…off-putting. Besides, the whole trial was rigged from the start! How were you supposed to know that?"

"Yeah, but still…I spent freaking hours preparing for this trial, and now all that effort been flushed down the drain" Goombella said, enraged. "Gag me with a spoon, I'm dropping my law major as soon as I'm back at U Goom".

"Yeah, well, no crying over spilled milk" Mario said, trying to be as reassuring as he can.

"Yeah…no use getting upset now…" Goombella said, holding back some tears. "But I do know I'm not wasting another second of my bitchin vacation!"

Before either of them could react, Goombella was out the door of the courtroom shouting for someone, anyone, to give her a beer. Finally someone unseen tossed her one and she opened it like she it was her first drink in years.

"Whoo-hoo, freedom!" she shouted before running back into Delfino Plaza, still wearing her stolen red skirt.

Peach simply sighed as she watched the energetic Goomba take off into the distance, leaving her and Mario alone and distraught in the courtroom.

"Well, at least she can't get you while you're in that cell" said Princess Peach. "Partiers like her are bad influence".


	12. Chapter 11: Gooper Blooper Breaks Out

It didn't take Mario and Peach long after leaving the courtroom under heavy police guard for them to see something very familiar. F.L.U.D.D., who had been missing for the past week, was chasing Shadow Mario all throughout Delfino Plaza once again, squirt nozzle firing at full force. This raised an angry fervor in the local Piantas who were just told moments ago that their terrorizer was being put behind bars, but most of them ultimately continued on with their day as normal.

That was, except for those who F.L.U.D.D. accidentally doused as the android ran through the streets, desperately trying to hit Shadow Mario. Those unlucky pedestrians F.L.U.D.D. sprayed angrily shouted and swore at the little robot, unaware of all the hard work it had done for the island.

"Sorry" F.L.U.D.D. said politely to every Pianta it soaked, taking away precious processing power it could have used to better aim at its target.

Shadow Mario was now being much more evasive in his running style, and was constantly weaving in and out of crowds and ducking behind street vendors. He knew he couldn't let F.L.U.D.D. get another clear shot, and was doing everything in his power to make himself scarce.

F.L.U.D.D. kept up its persistent chase, however, and Shadow Mario knew he couldn't keep dodging the robot's blasts forever. He eventually managed to get enough distance between himself and the android, and opened up another M shaped portal on a nearby boathouse, hoping that it would close fast enough for F.L.U.D.D. to be left behind.

Unfortunately for both of them, however, the robot made it through the portal just fine.

* * *

Despite the interruption in the street, Mario was escorted back to the prison just fine. Peach watched on in disgust as everyone on the streets just let the man they knew was innocent was being taken to jail.

"How could they do this?" Peach said out loud to herself, crossing her arms in contempt.

"Because the judge said so" said someone from behind her.

The Princess turned around to face who was speaking to her, and saw a Pianta man leaning against the wall of the prison. He had light blue hair and a matching blue grass skirt, complimented by a stunningly white business jacket, red tie, and dark sunglasses. Even though his posture was relaxed, he seemed very intimidating.

"Who are you?" the Princess asked nervously.

"Me?" he asked back, standing up from against the grey brick wall. "I'm the one who understands how things really work on this island. I am one of the most feared men on this island. I am…"

Suddenly, a second, high pitched voice interjected from behind Peach and finished what the man was saying. "He's Frankie, head of the Pianta Syndicate, and bestest husband in the whole world!" said the voice.

Peach turned around and saw a blonde Pianta woman with a cheery smile on her face, wearing a large white shirt, with a matching white hat that went over the small palm tree on her head. She had a red tie like the blue haired Pianta, but it wasn't properly tied.

"Aww, sugar plumb!" whined Frankie. "You ruined my dramatic introduction! I almost never get to do those!"

"Sorry Frankie, I just got so excited" said the peppy Pianta. "It isn't every day that you get to meet a princess!"

"Excuse me!" interrupted Peach, tired of all the games. "Would one of you please explain to me what's going on?"

Frankie simply sighed and said "Come, walk with us; this will take a while".

* * *

F.L.U.D.D. tried its best not to overload its processors as it was whisked away through a portal for the second time that day. It did not want a repeat of what happened the first time it tried traveling through a portal, in case it lost yet another eye.

Once on the other side, the robot was rewarded the fruits of its labor by managing to right itself in the air and land safely on its feet. F.L.U.D.D.'s cameras quickly began scanning the area, trying to locate Shadow Mario as quickly as possible. All it saw though were the orange doors of several large storage units staring back.

Turning around, F.L.U.D.D.'s cameras then gazed upon a huge open harbor, with scaffolding suspended above the ocean waves with lifts ready to receive cargo from incoming ships. There were only two ships in port though, and neither of them had any cargo on board. The harbor was completely dry of traffic, and it was easy to see why; everything was covered in a dark oil.

Everything in sight beyond the small warehouse by F.L.U.D.D. was absolutely covered in an olive black, ink-like material. From the ships, to the lighthouse, to the cliff side town suspended above the harbor, to the water itself, everything was coated in the mysterious substance, and that confused the robot considerably.

"Is this more graffiti?" wondered F.L.U.D.D. "Or was there an industrial accident?"

The robot knew that it couldn't be graffiti since it wasn't being dissolved by the water, but at the same time there was no other explanation if Shadow Mario was involved.

F.L.U.D.D.'s suspicions were confirmed when it looked down and saw a large M plastered on the ground in black ink, taunting the little robot; it had arrived too late.

"Why hello there old boy" said a Pianta man with orange hair, a captain's jacket, and a captain's hat with a Shine Sprite emblazoned on the front. "You must be this 'F.L.U.D.D.' I've been hearing so much about".

"Sorry, but I am not a boy" F.L.U.D.D. said before it really processed what else the man had said. "You have heard of me?" asked F.L.U.D.D.

"Why of course!" said the Pianta Captain. "You're the hero of the Bianco Hills! I've been becoming quite a fan of hearing your exploits on the radio. Fighting giant beasts, surfing treacherous waters, you're practically a Captain Elmo in the making!"

F.L.U.D.D. tilted its cranial processing unit at that last comment. "Is this man referring to himself?" thought F.L.U.D.D. "His body mass does not suggest that he has ever done anything so physically stressful".

"That's me, by the way; Captain Elmo!" he said before taking F.L.U.D.D.'s new hand and shaking it viciously. "When I heard about what you were doing, I knew I just had to meet you myself. I was told that coming into port was dangerous, but did that stop Captain Elmo? No! He never backs down from adventure! So I bravely sailed into port and-"

"-and got the whole ship covered in this gunk" shouted one of the sailors from the nearby ship, who was currently trying to mop off the black toxic sludge on deck to no avail.

"Erm, yes, well…" mumbled the captain. "It was a perilous journey, but worth it! I step off my boat, and immediately run into you! My boy, we must have been fated to meet".

F.L.U.D.D. didn't bother correcting the man this time, and instead asked "Why did you want to see me so desperately that you risked the integrity of your ship?"

"Why, to join you, of course!" said the man, his stomach undulating like a smoothie as he enthusiastically raised his fist. "I couldn't let you have all the fun saving the island, could I?"

The robot's circuits jolted a bit at these words; "Fun?" it thought. "What kind of sicko would find this kind of thing fun?"

It restrained itself from saying this out loud though, and decided to instead take advantage of the help the man was offering. After all, it wasn't like F.L.U.D.D. had people lining up to fight these monsters.

"Very well, I accept your help" said F.L.U.D.D., shaking the Captain Elmo's hand. "Would you kindly tell me where we are?"

"Why, you're in none other than Ricco Harbor, the biggest, busiest, and most ricco harbor in all of Isle Delfino!" he said proudly, though is shoulders slumped just a few moments later. "That was until a few weeks ago, when this awful goo started clogging the harbor. It's been incredibly hard for the ships to get into port, let alone unload cargo. The whole island is almost broke now, and it's been even worse for us entrepreneurs; why just this week, I had to sell by private helicopter because I couldn't afford fuel. Can you imagine something more tragic?"

F.L.U.D.D. was only dedicating a few processors to listen to the man's story, and was instead focusing on scanning the area with its cameras. It couldn't locate the source of the black goo anywhere, however; no goop generator, no giant monster, and no Shadow Mario.

"Sir?" it asked, refocusing on the bumbling captain. "Where is the graffiti coming from?"

"Ah, that's the kicker isn't it? We know exactly where it's coming from, but no one can get to it! It's been leaking from some unmarked creates in the city district marketplace, but no one's been able to reach it since something destroyed the stairs leading up to it. But, I know that with your brains and my brawn, we'll find a way to put a stop to this!" exclaimed Captain Elmo, excitedly.

"Very well; let's got" F.L.U.D.D. said before setting off at a dead towards what it deducted to be the main city, jumping onto and over several decks of Captain Elmo's ship.

The Captain tried his best to keep up, but stopped following as soon as he got to the robot's first jump. "Don't worry about me" he said panting, and with pools of sweat perspiring from his pits. "I'll…catch up…eventually".

F.L.U.D.D.'s expectations weren't high for this man, but it couldn't help but feel a bit disappointed that he wasn't going to be much help. The android continued onto a construction site near a lighthouse, which was littered with bricks, scaffolding, and concrete mixers.

"They must be here to repair the stairs" F.L.U.D.D. thought was it jumped up onto some of the scaffolding and hovered up onto the cliff side town above. Several soaked the construction workers below cried up impotently as F.L.U.D.D. flew by, but all it could do was meekly apologize as it tried to make it over to the town in one burst.

When its robotic feet hit the ground again, F.L.U.D.D. suddenly found itself in a ghost town. Apartments appeared empty and had their windows boarded, food stands lay empty in the streets, fruit was still rotting where their owners left them. Oil graffiti was almost everywhere.

"What happened here?" F.L.U.D.D. wondered out loud as it began walking through the streets, avoiding the goo wherever it could. As it made its way to the colorful cargo containers, it stopped by fountain in the middle of the road and refilled its water tanks. Even though the water had long been stagnant, F.L.U.D.D. was not going to take any chances of running out for what was to come.

It wasn't long before F.L.U.D.D. finally reached the crates and saw all graffiti leaking out from under them. F.L.U.D.D. tried to dissolve the goo away using its squirt nozzle, but to no avail. It could push the goo around, but not actually get rid of it like the mud graffiti.

F.L.U.D.D. turned its attention towards the crates and examined them for any way inside. It tried pulling the doors open, looking for a way in through their roofs, and even looking for any cracks or imperfections in the crates. The search was fruitless, however, and once again the robot was left unsure of what to do next. Out of desperation, F.L.U.D.D. knocked on the large steel doors of one of the greats to see if someone would answer it. It was not expecting a respecting a response, but one came anyway.

"Coming, dear!" called a voice from within the crates.

F.L.U.D.D. was slightly stunned, but pleased; perhaps this was going to be easier than it thought.

*Boom*

The door of the crate suddenly slammed open and sent the little robot flying back several feet when it collided with F.L.U.D.D.'s body. This was followed by the storage container belching out a dark smoke, concealing whatever was inside. After a few moments, something began to emerge from the crates.

He wasn't a giant, like Petey Piranha, but F.L.U.D.D.'s short stature meant the strange man still towered over the machine. It was very hard to tell that it was a man though, because of how thick its clothes were; a white poncho with blue dots covering a white shirt, a large white skirt covering poofy white pants, a gas mask with a small hose dripping oil graffiti covering its face, a blue/white skid cap covering its head, and a white backpack resting on his back. The only exposed skin on him was, oddly enough, his feet.

Extruding from under his poncho and from behind his back were two long, bleach white tentacles with blue tips, each moving independently of each other. "Why?" F.L.U.D.D. asked some unknown deity in its head. "Why did it have to be tentacles again?"

"Why, hello there, little one. Have you come to be cleaned as well?" asked the strange man.

"Cleaned?" asked F.L.U.D.D., shocked. "You're the one who's getting everything dirty!"

"Au contraire, this harbor has not been cleaner since Gooper Blooper arrived!" he said excitedly, and pointed towards the bay with his left arms.

"All that dirty water, with disgusting bacteria and fish, has been completely sterilized. Then I took the liberty of cleaning the town as well" he said.

"What did you do?" F.L.U.D.D. asked while nervously glancing back at the town behind them.

"Do you know how many bacteria are on a Pianta's body at any given time?" asked Gooper Blooper. "Millions! They had all had to be sterilized as well; and so will you".

With that, the man took a deep breath and fired oil graffiti out of the hose on its gas mask towards the terrified robot. F.L.U.D.D. had just enough time to jump out of the way and begin running away from the constant stream of gack. F.L.U.D.D. tried firing its squirt nozzle at the insane man, but all that did was get his clothes wet.

"Ew, where has this water been, a sewer?" he asked while simply shrugging the water off from its thick protective clothes. "Someone needs to be punished!"

Gooper Blooper ran towards F.L.U.D.D. surprisingly quickly, and swung its fore-tentacles towards the fleeing robot. Each blow struck the ground with a thundering slam, each kicking up a lot of dust, and each getting closer and closer to F.L.U.D.D. as they ran through the streets of the empty town. The robot tried its best not to run into any of the goo that lined the town, but eventually one wrong step caused it to trip and come crashing to the ground.

Gooper Blooper moved in for the killing blow, but F.L.U.D.D. managed to roll out of the way and latch onto one of the monstrous man's backpack tentacles. It pulled with all its might, hoping to cause some damage, until finally it popped off with a loud snap.

The man leapt backwards, seemingly in pain, as the cauliflower tentacle continued to flail on the ground before turning a rotten black and melting away into oil graffiti.

"How dare you?!" yelled Gooper Blooper though his mask. "That hurt, you know! What did I ever do to you? Now I have one less arm to clean with…"

Without warning, he fired his goo at F.L.U.D.D. again, catching the robot off guard. It took the blast straight to the chest, causing it to stumble backwards a little. Even though the oil graffiti was 'clean', F.L.U.D.D. couldn't help but feel horribly dirty as the goop began dripping down its torso.

It desperately tried to rub the goo off, but that simply gave Gooper Blooper plenty of time to come in for another attack with his tentacles. F.L.U.D.D. again dodged out of the way and began pulling on another tentacle until that too popped from its socket.

"Ouch" Blooper cried, only its fore-tentacles remaining. "Now you're really starting to annoy me". He again charged forward towards F.L.U.D.D., but this time his strikes were more direct, like punches, instead of downward slams. F.L.U.D.D. continued to dodge as best as it could, but when a hit nearly caught it in the chest, it knew it would have to think of something quickly.

The robot slowly began maneuvering itself and its attacker towards one of the boarded up buildings, and tried its best to position itself correctly. At just the right moment, F.L.U.D.D. managed to duck out of the way of an incredibly strong blow, and cause Gooper Blooper to smash through the boards of one of an abandoned building's window.

"What the…hey!" he yelled when he discovered he couldn't pull its tentacle back out. F.L.U.D.D. seized both the opportunity and its opponent's free tentacle, and started pulling with all the might its motors could muster.

"No, don't!" Gooper Blooper begged, but its pleas fell of deaf microphones. Both its remaining tentacles tore off at once, leaving himself without any arms. Naturally, there was nothing he could do to stop himself from landing right on his gasmask when he inevitably came crashing to the ground.

"Uh, I could use a little help up" he said awkwardly, not really expecting F.L.U.D.D. to help him up.

Shockingly though, it did help him back up to his feet, and even helped keep him steady for a few seconds.

"Wow, thanks" he said, immensely relieved. "Maybe the two of really can get along. I can see it now; the two of us, cleaning up the isl-"

But before he could finish, F.L.U.D.D. grabbed onto the end of Gooper Blooper's gas mask and pulled it back as hard as the robot could.

"I'm sorry, but the two of us mix like oil and water".

With a loud smack, the mask collided back with Gooper Blooper's face, which sent him tumbling over the edge of the town and into the oily waters below. After a few moments, the graffiti around the bay began to disappear, and a Shine Sprite began glowing beneath the surface of the water. It flew off back towards Delfino Plaza, and Ricco Harbor was finally safe for trade once again.

F.L.U.D.D. still needed to find a place to recharge for the night though, and it wasn't sure if electricity would still be working in a ghost town like this. F.L.U.D.D. almost let out a sigh of annoyance until it remembered it had no lungs to sigh with. Instead, it headed back to the main harbor to try and find somewhere safe to rest before it resumed its search for the perpetrator in the morning.


End file.
